Great Couples Counseling in Oyster Bay, NY. Therapy to heal relationships.

I use the Gottman Method of couples counseling for couples, whether you're partners or married, this approach has been backed by 40 years of research to be successful. It includes an extensive intake process since each couple is unique, a feedback session, and from there specified exercises and tools to target the areas of your relationship that can be improved.

Marriage or couple relationships are a tug of war for power and control. When the leverage of the couple becomes one sided: disappointment, fears, worries and anger become predominant emotions. At this point, you may think about leaving because you can't understand your conflicted feelings. Remember, " You can't run away from yourself". It is essential to know your contribution to the dysfunction in the relationship. When you can face your feelings and behaviors patterns and take responsibility for your actions leaving the "blame" behind, the couple begins the repair process enabling respectful listening and communicating leading to healing feelings and setting the stage for intimacy.

Drawing close in intimacy in a couple can be challenging. Being close to another person can result in buttons getting pushed in areas of the self that were never resolved. Despite the challenge, we deeply want to feel intimacy in life. Intimacy in relationship, while often challenging, is one of the greatest opportunities for growth. Caring, compassionate communication between partners opens each person to deeper feeling, connection, and expression. These capacities are crucial for a fulfilled life. I help you learn genuine communication expressing your needs while respecting and caring for your partner. These fulfilling communications lead to a better relationship and a better life.

Couples sometimes find that their relationships – once the source of so much intimacy and joy – have become disappointing, even destructive. We all reach impasses in our relationships, and these can be opportunities to overcome obstacles and grow together or to recognize irreconcilable differences and end the relationship in a healthy way. Together in therapy we can work to help you shift from criticizing and blaming to discovering individual feelings that underlie the surface conflicts. It can have a liberating and transformative effect on both you relationship and yourselves.

Couples can be premarital, marital, same sex, transgender, lesbian or gay. Couples can be sexually involved, emotionally involved, or both. I love working with couples of all types! There are many themes that occur with couples that can cause problems, such as money, power, sexuality, children (if there are any), in-laws/family, friends, values, etc. I am experienced in working with couples of all kinds and helping you create better communication and intimacy. When you are in therapy, you will feel heard and respected in a way that you may not be able to feel without a facilitator. I will make sure that each of you have a forum to express yourselves respectfully.

Dr. Joel Stukalin and Dr. Sara Mandelbaum are particularly sensitive to the needs of unmarried couples, such as conflicts regarding trust, fidelity, emotional-bonding, finances, future-planning, resistance to committment. We have specialized in couples work for 40 years and have been highly praised by clients as attuned psychologists who truly understand the problems and frustrations of couples living together. As child psychologists, we additionally help couples negotiate important issues with child-care concerns. Dr. Joel and Dr. Sara offer realistic models to improve empathic-communication and problem-resolution with minimum disruption. Meaningful change can start within 4 sessions.

Couples are my passion and all I work with. We look at the negative cycles fueled by communication, money, parenting & blended families, careers, health, and/or sex/intimacy. When was the last time you had an open conversation with your partner that wasn't hijacked by your negative relationship cycle? I am also an affair specialist and have worked with countless couples to sift through the incredible pain to see if there is anything left of the relationship to be salvaged (in most cases, there is). I have met many couples who come in as roommates, where deep wounds are present. Couples feel like my office is a safe place to share, connect, and be heard.

Working with couples individually/collaboratively without blame or shame, assisting partners in understanding their role in the conflict, has been a primary focus of my 30+ years of clinical practice. I teach couples that there is no right way to live.The framework and ingredients are defined by each person in the relationship. Connection, not control, engagement, not enmeshment allow for ongoing individual growth and relationship capacity. Personal awareness, acknowledgement, new attitudes and behavioral action all contribute to building a bridge between partners. I assist my clients as they look to themselves not the other to create ongoing growth, capacity and fulfillment of commitment.

Couples, married or not, seek therapy for many reasons; including hoping to resolve differences, hoping to improve communication, and/or hoping to improve their intimate relationship. My work with couples, enhanced by my training in sex therapy, addresses these issues so as to help the individuals within the relationship more effectively express themselves and more effectively understand their partner, and so as to promote the overall strength and joy in the relationship itself.

I work with couples to become more conscious and intentional in their interactions. I teach couples specific communication skills to break destructive patterns of relating. I encourage each partner to look and their own behavior and how they may be contributing to the problems. I explore with couples how the problems they are having in their current relationship are related to their experiences in childhood. I work with couples on eliminating reactivity by implementing self-soothing techniques. My goal with couples is to have both partners feel heard and understood by each other.

I am a relationship therapist with years of training and experience helping couples to navigate the most painful and difficult chapters in their relationship. I will guide you with compassion, empathy, and a skill set that is born in working with couples across the country in their relationship challenges. I have been featured in Forbes, the Knot, and other leading media outlets discussing relationships, sex, and communication. I’d love to connect with you and your partner about the unique circumstances that you are facing and how I might be able to help.

My approach to working with couples begins with seeing both clients together to gain an understanding of their dynamic as well as the individual issues (including family of origin) that have brought them into therapy. I then help them determine their goals as a couple and develop a treatment plan, including empathic listening, relationship exercises, and communications counseling, that will help them achieve their objectives.

You know relationships are meant to offer love and care...Yet your connections are rimmed with insecurity, worry, doubt and a feeling of instability. You're not sure if there's something about way you interact in relationships or if it's related to the people you're around. Research proves that the biggest predictor of a happy, long life is the quality of relationships you're in. You're ready to clear the fog, and build solid connections.