Grief and Loss Counseling in Pelham, NY.

Grief and loss can happen when you're young or old. Whenever it happens it can result in an ongoing depression that can hamper your life. I understand how devastating it can be and use various approaches to help you recover and return to your best self. Having been there myself and worked through my own grief and loss, I know what it takes to overcome the pain of grief and loss, and I will help you overcome your own pain and regain your own healthy balance.

Grief counseling helps people cope with grief and mourning following the loss of a loved one or due to major life changes that trigger feelings of grief (i.e. job loss or divorce). It provides a space for individuals to work through and process the complex emotions surrounding loss. Healthy grieving results in remembering the loss with a newfound sense of peace, rather than searing pain.

The benefit of my approach for someone who is grieving and who has suffered a great loss is that I actively teach you how to accept things that cannot be changed. Only by achieving real acceptance can the individual carry on in life despite the loss. Acceptance in REBT does not mean liking or even denying the loss. Acceptance in REBT means to acknowledge that a great loss has occurred and to feel healthy negative feelings of sadness, even great sadness. The benefit that results is that one can still have some degree of enjoyment in life. One can function without guilt and do well in life despite having suffered a great loss. This is leverage over the loss, the thing that cannot be changed.

Grief and loss is, unfortunately, a normal part of living. There is no single "correct" way to grieve: different cultures and even individuals from the same culture grieve differently. The only consistent feature is that grief takes time. The most effective thing anyone can do for someone grieving is to be there—to listen, to empathize, to walk along with the grief. There is no "fixing" grief. But counseling can help prevent normal grief from developing into major depression or other mental health conditions.

The pain you experience after losing a loved one is an intense human experience that could make you feel abandoned, hopeless, and incapable of moving forward in life. In addition, sometimes there is grief connected to losing something: a job, an opportunity, a past that will not come back, a country you left behind. I can offer an empathic ear and listening to you as you ponder important questions at this point in your life: What does your grief say? What are the fears that accompany your grief and loss? Is there a way to move forward in life knowing that the present and future will be different because someone or something won't be there with you?

Loss can come in so many different forms, yet the pain is there and is strong. When we hold someone or something dear to our heart and then they suddenly gone, we are often left with a hole in our heart and need to grieve that loss. Grief looks different for each person. There are 5 main stages of grief that most people will go through in an order: Denial and Isolation, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. These are hard stages to walk through alone. Reach out and call one of our compassionate therapists at Mars and Venus Counseling Center who can help you to talk through each of the emotions that you experience at each stage.

Grief doesn't follow a schedule, and it doesn't always look like sadness. It can show up as anger, numbness, guilt, or even relief, and any of it is valid. Losing someone or something significant can shake your entire sense of self and purpose. I work with grieving clients using a combination of CBT, EMDR, and somatic approaches to help you process what you're carrying, at whatever pace feels right. We'll work through the hard emotions, find ways to honor what you've lost, and rebuild a sense of meaning. Healing from grief isn't about moving on. It's about learning to carry it differently.

The way that a person has learned to protect themself self from a traumatic event develops into a part of their character in adult life. Our clinicians are trained to help you understand all of your parts and show you that the scary experience is over. We help you truly feel that you got through it and you can protect yourself if you need to! With this approach, we invite the wise parts of you to care deeply for the parts of you who are hurting. You have the power to regain control over your life, move forward, and heal.

People experiencing grief and loss are often invaded by mixed emotions and thoughts, including sadness, guilt, anger, feeling frozen or ambivalent, to mention some. Difficult but essential, is to make sense of the situation and find hope. I help clients understand that what has happened might not be altered, but that they can use their own powers and that of their support systems to master the present moment.

When we lose someone we love, it feels like we have lost a part of ourselves. Something within us has been torn out, leaving a hole that we easily imagine will never heal. The pain can be profound, the feelings of helplessness, or regret, or guilt overwhelming. Having a partnership where you can talk through these feelings can make a huge difference not only in how quickly and how well you are able to move through the process of grieving, but also how you ultimately are able to frame the experience and your memories of the person lost into the narrative of your own self and life as you move forward. What you carry with you afterward is just as important as surviving the hurt of the loss.

If you have lost someone close to you through death, relocation or the end of a relationship, and feel isolated and lonely, it takes time and support to gently move forward in life. If you are shy or feel anxiety in social situations it can be hard to reach out for help and create the supportive relationships you need. I can help you move forward, gain a new sense of self worth, and begin to create meaningful nurturing social connections.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of grief & loss through the lens of innovation----instead of growing the same neural networks responsible for the pain in weekly therapy sessions, we reset the brain to move forward quicker and efficiently by working on the stuck limbic system so as to empower the person with more success and traction. For no one wants to stay in a grief mode for too long; but when you don’t include the brain in your work with someone, you risk describing the water to them while they drown and calling it success. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Suffering a loss of a loved one can be devastating. You do not have to do it alone. Studies show that when one has a strong support team this can greatly help in their grieving process. I will work with you (and your family- if you so chose) to understand the grieving process, the emotional, psychological and spiritual aspects to help you get through this most difficult time.