Great Couples Counseling in Laurel Hill, VA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Given the many challenges that can lead to divorce (money problems, adultery, differences in raising children, etc.) the wisest thing couples can do is to seek Christian counseling before they say "I do." No matter how solid a couple’s relationship may be, problems and differences will inescapably arise. Therefore, pre-marital counseling really operates as the best security system a couple could ever purchase. Our Christian counselors can be beneficial by familiarizing couples with targeted areas of conflict that often lead to divorce. These areas are: • Communication • In-Laws • Money/finances • Sexuality • Spiritual Intimacy • Roles (delegation of responsibilities)

Working with couples is my area of expertise and passion. I have seen relationships transform through the power of mutual understanding and increased sensitivity. Often couples become so entrenched in certain communication patterns that they can't even really see when and if their partner is trying to do something different. This is one way working with a good couples therapist can be so powerful - they can act as "translator" for partners, and dig through the years of pain and pattern to what's really in each other's minds and hearts. If both partners are willing, it's amazing what can happen; and even if only one person is willing, change is possible. I hold the hope until they can.

There are two most basic fears of intimacy that we all have: one is fear of abandonment, the other is fear of being taken over, of losing my autonomy. In a relationship, people often become polarized with one clinging and the other seeming distant. With awareness of our fears and how to take care of ourselves and each other, we will bring out the best in each other. Everyone knows how to speak and listen, right? Not so. The most difficult skills to learn are to speak self-responsibly about your own experience and to truly listen and understand the other person's experience even when you don't like it. To learn these skills enables love. I can help.

Married, partnered, exclusive, non-exclusive, gay, straight, cis, trans, or poly…relationships are tough. Being in relationship with another human being is the hardest work we will ever do. Whether you’re struggling with something as painful as infidelity or as simple as whether to get another cat, we can help you find your way back to where you want to be.

Like all psychotherapy, couples therapy is a process, but one in which I work to help both members of a partnership to feel heard while also working for measurable change that couples can notice and know when they are making progress. I use attachment models to inform my work with couples–helping couples to develop a safer, more fulfilling and secure partnership. I focus on both present circumstances while also working to understand how problems develop and providing ways to prevent their reoccurrence. Some of the issues that couples often seek treatment for include the following: Communication Managing Difficult Life Transitions Separation/Divorce Loss/Grief Parenting Saving your Marriage Pre-Marital Counseling Managing Conflict

Couple counseling often help improve communication and many other issues that come up in relationships . Even Couple that have been married or engaged for long time sometime get stuck when approached with how to handle situations in there relationship. Stanley Tamale Counseling Services has therapist that can address issued of lack of communication .

One of the most prevaling issues with one or both is to not feel "heard". Much emphasis has to be on the word "feelings". If one or the other has been abused in some way, they are very sensitive to "feelings". The word "being" is a key for stabilization of the relationship. I have done much research on the "Keys to Life" and one of the necessities is to trust. Listening and trusting are probably the glue that holds any relationship together and is foundational. A couple learning their primary function is not about themselves, but the common good of the family unit. After all, what will be your legacy? What will you be known for?

My "Treasure Therapy" helps couples to become aware of themselves and their partner and to appreciate our inherent worth. I use different lenses to analyze how our social identity and sense of worth is shaped by society. This is important for helping couples have a sense of mutuality. John Gottman, an expert in couples therapy, talks about how power differentials can actually impede trust in his book, The Science of Trust. My own PhD research looked at 91 couples and found 12 common factors that influenced the balance of power in heterosexual romantic relationships, summed up with the word "TREASURES" because it summarizes how we approach people as precious treasures.

I am a relationship therapist with years of training and experience helping couples to navigate the most painful and difficult chapters in their relationship. I will guide you with compassion, empathy, and a skill set that is born in working with couples across the country in their relationship challenges. I have been featured in Forbes, the Knot, and other leading media outlets discussing relationships, sex, and communication. I’d love to connect with you and your partner about the unique circumstances that you are facing and how I might be able to help.

Every relationship has its challenges. Sometimes it takes an outside person to help you and your partner work through these challenges in an empathic and objective way. I use techniques that have been proven to work. Together, we will create a trusting and safe environment where you and your partner can talk openly about the issues that divide you. I don’t take sides or place blame. Instead, I work to understand each of you as individuals and as a couple. Our work will focus on building better communication skills, having more positive experiences as a couple, and coping more effectively with challenges. Together, you and your partner can build a stronger relationship.

Working with couples is a dynamic process that requires the therapist to maintain a safe space where both people can feel heard and understood. I am a certified Imago therapist and use a dialogical process to increase the emotional intimacy between the two people. I have worked with straight, bi, gay and lesbian and transgendered couples, and many different ethnic groups---and find that the challenges are essentially the same---to create a bond of trust that allows for all parts of the two people to show up and be accepted in the relationship. I share helpful handouts that people can use when they are home, to be able to deal with conflict more skillfully.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

In my work with couples, I view the relationship through the lens of attachment theory. The person we chose to be our partner, may become our "secure home base" as your relationship grows to be a healthy partnership to celebrate, depend on and lean on through the ups and downs of life. I view couples counseling as working with three entities: both partners and the relationship. The relationship you both share becomes my focus as we all collaborate together to bring forth the best relationship you can imagine. I look forward to working with you both. I use EMDR, Emotion Focused Therapy and Expressive Arts in my work with Couples.