Great Couples Counseling in Vineyard, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Gaining the support of a trained therapist when you desire to improve your relationship with someone can be incredibly valuable. It can often feel like you are stuck in patterns of how you are responding to the other person, maybe you even notice how hard it can be to be honest and vulnerable with other person, despite desiring increased connection. I am trained in couples therapy and use a variety of approaches to support a couple in improving their relationship, depending on the needs of the couple. I am skilled in the Gottman approach and EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy for couples), and I also use IFS (Internal Family Systems). Call to discuss how I can support your relationship growth.

Couples struggling with repeated conflict, emotional injuries, and feelings of loneliness will find solace and rejuvenation in the therapy process. My approach to couples counseling is centered on healing attachment wounds and fostering a deeper connection between partners. By creating a compassionate and non-judgmental space, I guide couples in uncovering the underlying emotions that have led to the disconnection. Together, we will work to develop effective communication skills, rebuild trust, and cultivate empathy. You will experience relief from past hurts and discover new pathways to improved relational functioning, leading to a more satisfying and harmonious partnership.

Discover how you can go from rejected to connected! Did you know the reactivity you experience is not your fault? (This is one of the main things that causes fights and arguments. It's when you feel out of control, & it leads to doing or saying things you regret, impulsivity, & leads to hurt & separation). I show couples how they can reduce the personal & relational reactivity they experience & increase feeling peaceful, calm, understood, validated, safe, accepted, & connected. I help couples discover their attachment strategies (how we feel safe & get our needs met). This is necessary in order to create lasting improvement, safety, trust, understanding, & connection, in your relationship.

In Couples therapy I have completed Level Three Training in Gottman Method Couples Therapy and I use Gottman Method in therapy work. Gottman Method Couples Therapy is a structured, goal-oriented, scientifically-based therapy. Intervention strategies are based upon empirical data from Dr. Gottman’s three decades of research. This research shows us what actually works to help couples achieve a long-term healthy relationship. Also, in my practice, as needed, other therapy methods are employed as well.

Couples therapy often triggers roadblocks in communication. In being shaped by prior relationships, we create various meaning from our experiences as well as receiving and giving instructions on how to live. When we form new relationships of any kind, this gets challenged; coming together and finding a path forward that celebrates all involved is the key to success. My specialty is interracial couples; regardless of if you both come from different backgrounds, the goal is to create shared meaning that is co-constructed. I can help with this process.

Every marriage has its ups and downs. In fact, it is not the absence of conflict that makes a difference, it is how you manage conflict when it does arise that determines whether a marriage will survive. Successful couples have learned HOW to manage their conflicts in a way that honors the needs of both partners.

“I work to help couples understand and communicate with each other better. I help them uncover the complex and varied realities that impact them while moving them to a better and healthier relationship.” I have a passion for working with all ages, races, cultures and orientations. I incorporate mindfulness techniques, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) and methods by Satir and Minuchin into my sessions. My goal is to help couples to regain healthier ways of communicating and the ability to live with themselves as well as each other.

There are countless models of healthy romantic relationships, from monogamous to polyamorous, and unique variations between partners. The scripts for dating and longterm relationships of our parents’ generations may not be applicable to your relationship, and there is no formal education in how to be a good partner or how to identify unhealthy relationships. But there is psychological research that shows that effective communication, emotional openness, intimacy, and other factors contribute to healthy relationships. Creating these conditions are skills that can be learned. I practice brief humanistic and emotion-focused therapy (EFT) to help my LGBTQ and hetero clients learn these skills.

I am a Certified Gottman Therapist and use the world famous, clinically proven Gottman method in my work with you. The Gottman Method is backed by 40 years of research establishing what makes marriage succeed or fail. I bring a deep, abiding passion to helping you and your partner get back to the love that you have for each other. Using the Sound Marital House to asses your relationship strengths and weaknesses, according to the research, I customize our work together, focussing on the areas you need help and education with to restore trust, intimacy & friendship. Most people contact me for painful fighting that creates emotional and sexual distance. Learn tools to restore your relationship!

I use a combination of tried and true couples communication techniques to help couples create and build effective communication into their relationship. I also spend time on exploring sexual compatability and communication, when the couple wants their sexual lintimacy enhanced. IF there is lack of desire or an imbalance of desires, we address the roots of this.With couples who come for pre-marital counseling, we focus on communication skills and on common needs and wants the couple have for their impending marriage and family unit. We also look at any red flags that are showing up in the relationship.

Couples counseling can help when your are having difficulties in your relationship. Whether you are in a relationship, looking for pre-marital counseling, living together, or married, therapy can help you with your connection, communication, your ability to reduce conflicts, reduce resentments, and restore passion and intimacy. It can help your relationship if even just one of you come without your partner. When one person makes shifts in the relationship it can make positive changes as well. Many couples wait longer than necessary hoping the problems will just go away. Don't wait until it's too late. Get help and change the course of your relationship.

Relationships are beautiful, and also incredibly challenging! If you and your partner feel stuck in repeating arguments, emotional distance, or miscommunication, couples therapy offers a path forward. I help couples slow down and listen to what’s really happening underneath the conflict, so you can reconnect with empathy, clarity, and trust. Whether you're rebuilding after a rupture, navigating a transition, or simply wanting to feel close again, I provide a steady space to explore and repair your bond. Many couples leave sessions feeling more connected, understood, and hopeful about their future together.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php