Grief and Loss Counseling in Haworth, NJ.

Relationship endings are a guaranteed part of life that everyone experiences. When a relationship concludes – whether through death, divorce or some other reason – it is common to review it, examine it and even wish that something about it was different. Perhaps we regret something we said or longed to hear something from the other person. Endings are accompanied by conclusions to our hopes and dreams for the future. My approach to working with grieving clients is to permit them fully feel their loss and to process their grief in their own way and at their own pace. When it comes to grieving clients I will join with them in their loss and will encouraging them to feel all the feelings that surface about the person and the relationship they shared.

Grief and bereavement are the natural emotional responses to any kind of loss. It involves experiencing intense feelings, many of them unexpectedly and overwhelmingly. Loss is a personal journey; while grieving can often foster compassion and connection among family and friends, it is also common for the griever to experience difficulties identifying and sharing feelings or experience inter-personal conflict. Even, guilt, anxiety and anger may rise in addition to sadness and sorrow during grief. Bereavement counseling can provide a safe space to explore the struggles inherent to loss, with the support and understanding of a professional.

Grief is a deeply painful and often lonely and scary process to experience. Depending on the severity of your loss, it can impact every aspect of your life, like a giant ball in the box that is your life. Every time the ball hits the wall of the box it hurts. Over time, the ball gets smaller and doesn't impact every aspect of your life. However, when it does bounce against the wall it hurts just like it did in the beginning. With the right understanding of how grief it ebbs and flows over time and the space to allow it to be expressed, one can begin to heal.

The pain you experience after losing a loved one is an intense human experience that could make you feel abandoned, hopeless, and incapable of moving forward in life. In addition, sometimes there is grief connected to losing something: a job, an opportunity, a past that will not come back, a country you left behind. I can offer an empathic ear and listening to you as you ponder important questions at this point in your life: What does your grief say? What are the fears that accompany your grief and loss? Is there a way to move forward in life knowing that the present and future will be different because someone or something won't be there with you?

The loss of an important person, can be a terrible shock. I help you with moving through the process of grieving, including issues of survivor guilt, anxiety and depression that may arise after a loss, whether it be loss of a person, job, or pet. When grief feels overwhelming, I can provide the support needed to find meaning in the past, and hope for the future.

The benefit of my approach for someone who is grieving and who has suffered a great loss is that I actively teach you how to accept things that cannot be changed. Only by achieving real acceptance can the individual carry on in life despite the loss. Acceptance in REBT does not mean liking or even denying the loss. Acceptance in REBT means to acknowledge that a great loss has occurred and to feel healthy negative feelings of sadness, even great sadness. The benefit that results is that one can still have some degree of enjoyment in life. One can function without guilt and do well in life despite having suffered a great loss. This is leverage over the loss, the thing that cannot be changed.

We all experience loss at one point in our lives, but that doesn’t make it easier. Whether you’ve experienced the loss of a loved one, a relationship, a job, or something else meaningful to you, loss can leave us feeling alone, depressed, confused, and empty. I have extensive experience working with children and adults who have experienced loss and complicated grief. I provide a safe, gentle, and non judgemental environment and use a mix of trauma focused cognitive behavioral and insight oriented interventions. Through our work together you will begin to process your grief experience, learn coping skills to get you through the day, honor what you have lost, and to ultimately heal.

Our credentialed music therapists tailor sessions to each individual, utilizing personalized music exercises and interventions to address each person's unique experiences of loss or trauma. Involvement in music addresses trauma in two ways: music reaches us on an emotional level to help with coping, as well as on a neurological level to address and heal areas of the brain that are affected when trauma or loss are experienced. Our music therapists work with each client using musical elements like songwriting, processing, and guided imagery to help clients find their own voice and learn new coping skills to help manage trauma of any severity.

When I very young I lost my fiancée. I went about life as if nothing had happened until it caught up to me. I was trying to open a door with a key and it wouldn't work. I found myself crying and felt out of control. This happened because I didn't want to grieve. What I learned is you can't skip this process. It will catch up to you at the strangest times. I can walk you through this without bottoming out. Ignoring it and avoiding it doesn't work

Grief is about loss and the threat of loss. The stronger the bond between us and the person we have lost, the more we will hurt both physically and emotionally. When we are torn from a family member or friend, a part of us dies as well. Our natural need for attachment gets severed, often bringing the return of childhood fears. The world feels like a more dangerous place. As a result, we may feel out of control. We ache to have the loved person back. We know in the rational part of our minds that the person is not coming back, but it also seems impossible to let him go. We will remain emotionally conflicted until we can release our loved ones. Because letting go is so difficult, we must do it slow....

Often clients reach out to a psychotherapist when there is a death or separation in a relationship. Chris provides Grief and Loss counseling and Psychotherapy where empathy and caring help clients get emotional closure to help them move forward. A sudden death and loss can causes a person to have increased anxiety and depression and limit functioning. Chris has worked with numerous clients to heal and move forward through effective counseling and psychotherapy in New York. Clients benefit from talking out their feelings where I help them get closure and provide the skills to move on and enjoy life again.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of grief & loss through the lens of innovation----instead of growing the same neural networks responsible for the pain in weekly therapy sessions, we reset the brain to move forward quicker and efficiently by working on the stuck limbic system so as to empower the person with more success and traction. For no one wants to stay in a grief mode for too long; but when you don’t include the brain in your work with someone, you risk describing the water to them while they drown and calling it success. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Grief and loss can be triggered by many things; the death of a loved one, the loss of a beloved mate, being let go at a valued job, and many others. When we cannot get over the loss by ourselves, a therapist point us down new roads. Suddenly vistas of possibility begin to open up, and what once seemed hopelessly sad begins to take on its proper importance.