Grief and Loss Counseling in Haworth, NJ.

Dealing with grief and loss is thought by most people to be life’s greatest challenge. Whether it be loss of a partner, child, friend, or other important person in one’s life, it is universally a sad and tremendously challenging part of the human experience. I have worked with people who have experienced losses of all types throughout the lifecycle, and helped them to understand the compendium of complex feelings and challenging situations that accompany grieving. Although in the midst of grief, there is often a sense of despair, I have helped hundreds of people resolve grief, and move on with their lives.

Grief is about loss and the threat of loss. The stronger the bond between us and the person we have lost, the more we will hurt both physically and emotionally. When we are torn from a family member or friend, a part of us dies as well. Our natural need for attachment gets severed, often bringing the return of childhood fears. The world feels like a more dangerous place. As a result, we may feel out of control. We ache to have the loved person back. We know in the rational part of our minds that the person is not coming back, but it also seems impossible to let him go. We will remain emotionally conflicted until we can release our loved ones. Because letting go is so difficult, we must do it slow....

Grief and loss inevitably leads to anger & sadness. Not surprisingly, it also can lead to depression and feelings of guilt. The latter is called irrational guilt, as most of us lack magical powers to cure dying people. Even if they mean the world to us. I would encourage my clients to express feeling of guilt and anger often unconscious related to the loss. The anger is often at the person who died. Of course, this is irrational anger in most cases, as we all are going to die. The anger is over losing someone we love, value. I would use clinical interventions that usher in the grieving process. This fosters coming to terms with and an acceptance of the loss.

The benefit of my approach for someone who is grieving and who has suffered a great loss is that I actively teach you how to accept things that cannot be changed. Only by achieving real acceptance can the individual carry on in life despite the loss. Acceptance in REBT does not mean liking or even denying the loss. Acceptance in REBT means to acknowledge that a great loss has occurred and to feel healthy negative feelings of sadness, even great sadness. The benefit that results is that one can still have some degree of enjoyment in life. One can function without guilt and do well in life despite having suffered a great loss. This is leverage over the loss, the thing that cannot be changed.

Grief in and of itself is not a diagnosis. However, many people find themselves seeking out professional help following the loss of a loved one, the end of a relationship, or the loss of financial means. In grief and loss therapy you will benefit from a compassionate and warm environment where you can explore your grief with out judgement or fear. Grief is often isolating in our sessions not only will you be given the space to process and remember your loss, but also the tools and guidance necessary to eventually continue a fulfilling life.

Individuals struggling with grieving the loss of a loved one can learn how to cope and heal from these painful life experiences and ease the trauma of grief. EMDR can assist in helping to relieve suffering and allow the natural process of grief and mourning to continue in a healthy, adaptive way. Clients can reprocess distressing memories that may relate to grieving process.

If you have lost someone close to you through death, relocation or the end of a relationship, and feel isolated and lonely, it takes time and support to gently move forward in life. If you are shy or feel anxiety in social situations it can be hard to reach out for help and create the supportive relationships you need. I can help you move forward, gain a new sense of self worth, and begin to create meaningful nurturing social connections.

I teach my clients about the stages of grief. This often which helps to normalize what they are experiencing. It can be so overwhelming and isolating to lose someone you love. I give clients a safe place to explore all of their emotions around their loss. I work to help clients feeling grounded again and take the steps necessary to find a new normal.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of grief & loss through the lens of innovation----instead of growing the same neural networks responsible for the pain in weekly therapy sessions, we reset the brain to move forward quicker and efficiently by working on the stuck limbic system so as to empower the person with more success and traction. For no one wants to stay in a grief mode for too long; but when you dont include the brain in your work with someone, you risk describing the water to them while they drown and calling it success. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161

BREAKUPS . SEPARATION . DIVORCE The end of a relationship brings deep grief and heartache. You aren't just losing a person — you're losing a future you planned, routines that anchored your days, and a part of yourself. Dreams shatter. I help individuals mourn what was lost and process the pain. Whether you're navigating divorce, a painful breakup, or the grief of realizing your partner wasn't who you believed them to be, you deserve space to feel it fully. Healing doesn't mean forgetting. It means reaching a place where the loss no longer defines your next chapter. Peace returns when you've processed the pain.

Personal loss such as a loved one or due to trauma needs to be mourned in order to move on in one's life. This difficult process requires a 'witness' to the emotional loss. Psychoanalysis serves the function of enabling a person to speak about the loss. It enables an individual to remember in a way that enhances the individual survivor.

Our credentialed music therapists tailor sessions to each individual, utilizing personalized music exercises and interventions to address each person's unique experiences of loss or trauma. Involvement in music addresses trauma in two ways: music reaches us on an emotional level to help with coping, as well as on a neurological level to address and heal areas of the brain that are affected when trauma or loss are experienced. Our music therapists work with each client using musical elements like songwriting, processing, and guided imagery to help clients find their own voice and learn new coping skills to help manage trauma of any severity.