Great Couples Counselling in Nanaimo, BC. Therapy to heal relationships.

Couples get caught in a cycle of trying to get the other to meet their unfulfilled needs. Early in a relationship this cycle usually works well, but eventually all couples find this early stage ends. Many couples need help to discover how to relate differently, once the honeymoon period ends. I work with couples to strengthen their ability work through difference in a manner that allows each partner to fill valued and respected. See my website for more detailed information.

At The Centre For Expressive Therapy, the first step is to help you feel comfortable before beginning to talk about what is foremost on your mind. At your pace and in your own unique way, you are encouraged to share whatever may have brought you to counselling and thus begin to explore your thoughts and feelings. Gradually we can then shed new light on the obstacles you have come across, as we engage in a conversation that encourages self reflection leading to a perspective that opens new possibilities. Using Expressive Therapy, we reflect to find practical solutions to underlying issues we have uncovered. Then you can integrate these discoveries into your life and resolve your issues.

Relationships can be complicated because each individual brings to it their own set of expectations, needs, hopes, and communication styles, based on past experiences. As a result, all relationships experience conflict or disagreement to some extent. If this conflict is not resolved it may seem as if there is no hope for the relationship. Through counselling you will gain insight about your partner, clarify your relationship vision, and learn healthier ways of communicating and supporting each other.

Achieve clear and effective communications, learn to speak about expectations and disappointments, set boundaries and mutual goals, ease tension and conflicts, discuss and process past hurts, learn the freedom in taking responsibility or owning our actions, patterns, and projections. These are some of the benefits of couples counseling. Where appropriate, Janine incorporates Art therapy or creative activities that can be completed both separately and together to assist in your particular the healing journey.

If you are coming to couples therapy, you and your partner have developed unhealthy patterns of relating. I will help you overcome your toxic communication patterns. If there has been an affair, I will help you recognize and acknowledge the deep emotional trauma it has caused. I will help you move from self-focus to partner-focus, and finally I will help move you from blame to understanding and empathy.

Couples and families have many different configurations today and the methods I use foster connections between two people. The brains of human beings are naturally wired for relationship with others so when distance occurs between people, unhappiness and loneliness develops. I offer a safe and controlled space for couples to explore these feelings, learn about the deeper parts of each other and repair the distance between them by using the right combination of compassion and directness. The techniques and tools I use are grounded in relationship research and I have the advanced training and experience to help.

Couples counselling focuses on developing strong communication skills, conflict resolution techniques, forgiveness, and effective dialogue. Many couples experience frustration at some point in their relationship where they feel they are not heard, valued or even loved any more. A toxic cycle of blaming, fighting and pulling away begins to form, creating distance and fatigue. For others an affair has shaken the very core of the safety and love they once felt in their relationship. It can be an agonizing and terrifying discovery for the partner who has been betrayed, and strong feelings of guilt, shame and a lack of understanding to how it even happened for the offending partner. Whether you are looking for a tune up to build back the excitement and...(view profile to read more)

I help couples move beyond conflict and distance by focusing on what lies beneath--the patterns and emotions creating problems. I do this in a gentle, non-judgemental way that allows couples to gain control of their interactions, finding a deeper sense of connection, intimacy, and understanding. By connecting emotionally you can avoid the negative interactions which are often rooted in couples not feeling their partner truly hears them. Couples therapy is an active process of helping you find effective, long-term solutions to gridlock, trust, emotional distance, sexual issues, and more. When your relationship works, everything else in life just works that much better.

When choosing a long-term relationsip, you are inevitably choosing a particular set of unsolvable problems that you'll be grappling with for the next ten, twenty or fifty years. Couples are repeatedly in the position of having to choose between expressing their feelings and causing a disagreeable interaction or withholding them & increasing their isolation. Anger is just a sentence away, but so is Intimacy. I approach couples therapy with the belief that learning how to truely hear what our partners are saying & feeling can enable a relationship to move forward despite the problems encountered. Learning these skills help; communication, boundaries, emotional regulation & sexual intimacy.

Relationship are complicated and can be difficult. Each partner has had an upbringing, and life experiences that have shaped their values and outlook on life. These may differ from the outlook and values of their partner. Each partner also has their own methods of coping: direct, avoiding, exploding, running, and retreating. As your counsellor, I will help you both explore how your similarities help and hinder your relationship. You will gain a better understanding of why you and your partner 'do what you do'. You will learn effective ways of communicating, problem solving, managing emotions and conflict; in an effort for you both to achieve respect and love.

Couples counselling provides an opportunity to shift malaptive patterns of interacting, improve communication, and develop tools for managing conflict and resolving emotional wounds in the relationship. Many couples adopt approaches to resolving conflict that are ineffective in bringing a sense of closeness and connection. In spite of good intentions, efforts to repair the interpersonal challenges encountered by a couple may prove to be ineffective. Therapy provides an opportunity to help a couple discover more effective ways to meet each others needs and create a more harmonious style of interacting.

Many couples struggle with communication and "feeling heard". Over time a once happy and vibrant relationship can begin to decay through hurt feelings, anger, lack of attention, feeling valued, infidelity, the strain of children, childhood issues, and much more. We focus to heal the wounds of the past and rebuild the love and trust within the relationship. We work to equip both partners with a voice and ability to effectively listen and hear one another. We will work together to establish individual boundaries within the relationship, while creating a stronger and healthier connection. Our goal is to equip each couple with the tools they require for success, independent of counselling