Grief and Loss Counselling in Ladysmith, BC.

Experiencing a loss goes beyond the loss of the family, friend, pet, or child to be. Not only have you lost the loved one physically; you lose what your life was with them; and what your future with them would have been. Overcoming such loss can feel overwhelming and impossible to heal. Counselling can make a significant difference in getting through this difficult period. Family members who may mean well may not understand the loss and inadvertently cause us pain: by expecting us to ‘get over it’, and by impatient and unsympathetic. Counselling offers a compassionate sounding board that is sympathetic and non-judgemental. We are able to heal at our own pace in a supportive environment.

Grief can come from many kinds of loss — the death of someone you love, the end of a relationship, changes within your family, or the loss of the future you thought you were going to have. There is no single right way to grieve, and sometimes the people around you may not understand why you are still struggling. I offer grief and loss counselling with warmth, compassion and space for whatever you are feeling. Using an emotion-focused approach, we can make sense of your grief, the relationships and attachments connected to your loss, and what it means to carry that loss while gradually finding your way forward.

After significant loss, you may experience difficult and surprising emotions, such as anger, shock and guilt. It may feel like the sadness will never go away. I know personally what this feels like and I support many people who are trying to find ways to cope and find their reason to continue. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. There are however many healthy ways to cope with the pain. You can get through it! I can help you.

Did you know that the "stages of grief" were actually developed for those facing death, NOT for those who have lost a loved one? Unfortunately, this leads many to feel they MUST grief in a certain order of stages. -And that if they don't, that they are somehow doing it wrong. NOT TRUE! Grief looks different for everyone and happens at it's own pace. I offer non-judgemental support and guidance to those who have suffered a significant loss. This includes the complicated grief of losing a living family member to addiction, mental illness or brain disease such as dementia.

Grief & loss can seem debilitating and overwhelming and many people struggle in moving on. Counselling is a highly effective resource for healing after a loss. Through compassion and understanding we will work to heal the pain of the event and move into acceptance and peace. Whether you are grieving the loss of a loved one, the loss of health or mobility, divorce or mid life transition, we can help.

A loved one dying affects everyone in a family and each member will work through their grief in their own way and timeframe. Empathizing and listening while offering comfort and support as individuals work through their depression, anger and guilt of the emotional roller coaster of grief in a safe environment for expression of self will enable one to move forward towards a healthier life.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of grief & loss through the lens of innovation----instead of growing the same neural networks responsible for the pain in weekly therapy sessions, we reset the brain to move forward quicker and efficiently by working on the stuck limbic system so as to empower the person with more success and traction. For no one wants to stay in a grief mode for too long; but when you don’t include the brain in your work with someone, you risk describing the water to them while they drown and calling it success. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

I have lived experience in grief and loss, and through talk therapeutic approaches, we will gently process through feelings of loss, guilt, tragic and overwhelming, devastating feelings that may be creating levels of dysfunction in your current life circumstances. I also utilize therapy walks to facilitate your movement through your loss and to assist in it by carrying and accepting your loss.

Losing someone in your life can be a painful, frustrating, and bewildering experience. Part of the grieving process is to express your grief and to share what your loss means. Through therapy, there are ways to support grief so it can be felt, understood, and integrated over time. I offer a safe, confidential, nonjudgmental place to talk about your grief and to create your own unique roadmap through this process. Some of the grief-related issues I help people explore include anger, hurt, feelings of abandonment, ambiguous feelings following the death of someone with whom the relationship was complicated, guilt, loneliness, and other complex emotional responses. “Hope begins in the dark.”

When working with grief and loss, I see that it affects a person's whole life in various ways. I recognize that it comes in waves and each person has their own timeline for working through it. I encourage clients to tell their story and not be afraid to share it with others, but that others will not always be open to hearing. Part of grieving is working through the memories and see each area of loss.

For complex grief and loss, clients can benefit from working with a therapist who is compassionate and patient, providing space and time to move at your own pace. At the same time, we will develop skills to help the nervous system regulate and relax while processing through sharing your story, using EMDR and working with nature to normalize the death and life cycles.

When losing someone or something important to us, it can take lots time to adjust and learn to live our life without that person, thing or way of life. Either it is the death of a loved one, loss of a relationship, loss of a pet, loss of a job or important possessions, change to your way of life, grieving is a normal response to a life event and bottling it up can create damage or even harm to a person. It can take time to adjust and accept to learn to live life without that person, thing or way of life. When it gets too challenging or overwhelming, or if it gets in a way of living a healthy life, sometimes turning to professional support can help getting through this challenging event.