Grief and Loss Counselling in Chemainus, BC.

Did you know that the "stages of grief" were actually developed for those facing death, NOT for those who have lost a loved one? Unfortunately, this leads many to feel they MUST grief in a certain order of stages. -And that if they don't, that they are somehow doing it wrong. NOT TRUE! Grief looks different for everyone and happens at it's own pace. I offer non-judgemental support and guidance to those who have suffered a significant loss. This includes the complicated grief of losing a living family member to addiction, mental illness or brain disease such as dementia.

Grief has a way of pulling the ground out from underneath you, and my work is to help you find steady footing again. In our sessions, we look honestly at the pain, the confusion, the anger—nothing is off-limits and nothing is “too much.” I guide you toward uncovering the meaning hidden inside your heartbreak, helping you rebuild a life that feels true rather than numb. Clients often experience a shift from simply enduring their loss to discovering a renewed sense of identity, purpose, and personal strength.

In grief and loss counseling, I create a flexible space that adapts to your needs. Whether you need patient listening or feel stuck and need guidance through open-ended questions, I meet you where you are. I'm genuinely curious about understanding you as a whole person and your unique loss—there's no shallow or rushed approach here, no platitudes or quick fixes. Something resourceful I offer is a therapeutic goodbye letter adapted from Elisabeth Kübler-Ross's work, helping you express complex, contradictory emotions—what you regret and don't regret, miss and don't miss. What makes this different is it honors the fullness of ambivalent feelings. Clients report feeling truly heard, not judged or rushed, as they move forward in their own time.

Losing someone through a relationship break up, the loss of life, or a major change in life circumstances can be the most profoundly sad experiences we endure in this life. A loss may feel insurmountable or you may be numb, rejecting the loss, avoiding the suffering that comes with acknowledging a new reality. It is sad but true that suffering is a part of human existence. But so is joy, happiness and contentment. Counselling can help you understand what you need in order to grieve. Recognizing the importance of your loss, accepting it and making plans for moving forward can help you continue on your path and learn to cope and survive your grief.

Losing a friend or family member can be devastating no matter the circumstances. We can also experience pain from losing a pet, a job or the ending of a relationship. Regardless of what kind of grief or loss you are struggling with, I will support you in facing your pain and finding a way forward. I will help you to understand the process and stages of grief and make sense of it. When we come to make meaning out of our loss our pain is lessened. I will also help you find peace and acceptance.

When losing someone or something important to us, it can take lots time to adjust and learn to live our life without that person, thing or way of life. Either it is the death of a loved one, loss of a relationship, loss of a pet, loss of a job or important possessions, change to your way of life, grieving is a normal response to a life event and bottling it up can create damage or even harm to a person. It can take time to adjust and accept to learn to live life without that person, thing or way of life. When it gets too challenging or overwhelming, or if it gets in a way of living a healthy life, sometimes turning to professional support can help getting through this challenging event.

For complex grief and loss, clients can benefit from working with a therapist who is compassionate and patient, providing space and time to move at your own pace. At the same time, we will develop skills to help the nervous system regulate and relax while processing through sharing your story, using EMDR and working with nature to normalize the death and life cycles.

A loved one dying affects everyone in a family and each member will work through their grief in their own way and timeframe. Empathizing and listening while offering comfort and support as individuals work through their depression, anger and guilt of the emotional roller coaster of grief in a safe environment for expression of self will enable one to move forward towards a healthier life.

Experiencing a loss goes beyond the loss of the family, friend, pet, or child to be. Not only have you lost the loved one physically; you lose what your life was with them; and what your future with them would have been. Overcoming such loss can feel overwhelming and impossible to heal. Counselling can make a significant difference in getting through this difficult period. Family members who may mean well may not understand the loss and inadvertently cause us pain: by expecting us to ‘get over it’, and by impatient and unsympathetic. Counselling offers a compassionate sounding board that is sympathetic and non-judgemental. We are able to heal at our own pace in a supportive environment.

When working with grief and loss, I see that it affects a person's whole life in various ways. I recognize that it comes in waves and each person has their own timeline for working through it. I encourage clients to tell their story and not be afraid to share it with others, but that others will not always be open to hearing. Part of grieving is working through the memories and see each area of loss.

After significant loss, you may experience difficult and surprising emotions, such as anger, shock and guilt. It may feel like the sadness will never go away. I know personally what this feels like and I support many people who are trying to find ways to cope and find their reason to continue. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. There are however many healthy ways to cope with the pain. You can get through it! I can help you.

I have lived experience in grief and loss, and through talk therapeutic approaches, we will gently process through feelings of loss, guilt, tragic and overwhelming, devastating feelings that may be creating levels of dysfunction in your current life circumstances. I also utilize therapy walks to facilitate your movement through your loss and to assist in it by carrying and accepting your loss.