Grief and Loss Counselling in North Cowichan, BC.

Did you know that the "stages of grief" were actually developed for those facing death, NOT for those who have lost a loved one? Unfortunately, this leads many to feel they MUST grief in a certain order of stages. -And that if they don't, that they are somehow doing it wrong. NOT TRUE! Grief looks different for everyone and happens at it's own pace. I offer non-judgemental support and guidance to those who have suffered a significant loss. This includes the complicated grief of losing a living family member to addiction, mental illness or brain disease such as dementia.

When we are mourning a loved one, whether it be a family member, the end of a close relationship, or even an animal that was dear to heart, it is a very complex and painful process. There is no one right way to grieve. Some clients need to discuss a specific situation word-for-word in order to process a loss and others need to just sit in the pain and cry. As a counsellor, I would be there on that journey with you. I would discuss with you what you want to discuss about the loss and I would use a client-centred approach to help guide you through your bereavement.

In grief and loss counseling, I create a flexible space that adapts to your needs. Whether you need patient listening or feel stuck and need guidance through open-ended questions, I meet you where you are. I'm genuinely curious about understanding you as a whole person and your unique loss—there's no shallow or rushed approach here, no platitudes or quick fixes. Something resourceful I offer is a therapeutic goodbye letter adapted from Elisabeth Kübler-Ross's work, helping you express complex, contradictory emotions—what you regret and don't regret, miss and don't miss. What makes this different is it honors the fullness of ambivalent feelings. Clients report feeling truly heard, not judged or rushed, as they move forward in their own time.

Losing someone through a relationship break up, the loss of life, or a major change in life circumstances can be the most profoundly sad experiences we endure in this life. A loss may feel insurmountable or you may be numb, rejecting the loss, avoiding the suffering that comes with acknowledging a new reality. It is sad but true that suffering is a part of human existence. But so is joy, happiness and contentment. Counselling can help you understand what you need in order to grieve. Recognizing the importance of your loss, accepting it and making plans for moving forward can help you continue on your path and learn to cope and survive your grief.

I understand that the pain you're going through right now feels unbearable, like a heavy weight on your soul. In our work together, we'll create a safe space to explore your feelings and memories, using therapeutic approaches tailored to your unique experience of grief. While the journey ahead may be challenging, it's important to remember that healing is possible. You don't have to go through this alone; I'll be here to support you every step of the way, helping you find a path toward hope and renewal.

Experiencing a loss goes beyond the loss of the family, friend, pet, or child to be. Not only have you lost the loved one physically; you lose what your life was with them; and what your future with them would have been. Overcoming such loss can feel overwhelming and impossible to heal. Counselling can make a significant difference in getting through this difficult period. Family members who may mean well may not understand the loss and inadvertently cause us pain: by expecting us to ‘get over it’, and by impatient and unsympathetic. Counselling offers a compassionate sounding board that is sympathetic and non-judgemental. We are able to heal at our own pace in a supportive environment.

When we are facing grief and loss, there is often a complex web of emotions and many layers of meaning-making to encounter in our healing process. The path is never linear. The timeline requires sensitivity and nuance. Compassion, patience and the ability to hold seemingly contradictory feelings are paramount. With gentle presence, we can hold the magnitude and the subtleties of this experience moving step by step towards healing.

In my grief counselling practice, I specialize in guiding individuals through the intricate emotions that emerge following the loss of a loved one or a significant life change. No one person's journey through grief is identical and it's often not a linear path. I provide a secure and nurturing space where you can openly express your feelings, delve into memories, and address the challenges associated with grief. I am committed to fostering a compassionate and understanding environment, supporting you on your journey to healing and finding a path forward.

I am honoured that you are interested in my services and I would like to tell you a little bit about myself. I have been described as slightly non-conventional in the counselling world, which suits me perfectly, and also tends to suit youth who are trying to stand up to the force of the problems in their life. I am very comfortable working with this population, and I feel fortunate that I can connect with teens the way I do, conventionally or in a way that makes sense to them.