Anger Management and Counseling in Kenilworth, NJ.

I can help you or your partner / family member with anger management. We'll start with a thorough assessment of what's going on, including the history of how anger was modeled to you in childhood, the influences of your culture and family, your own anger story, and any grief or trauma you've endured. Then we'll talk about how you want to manage anger and make a customized plan to reduce verbal conflict and eliminate physical violence as we develop a strategy to communicate your needs and boundaries to those you trust and have those needs and boundaries met and honored. I'll be with you every step of the way.

Are you struggling with anger? Do you have outbursts & regret them? Do you stuff your anger & then take it out on someone? Is anger tearing apart you or your relationships? Are you worried how it will affect your kids? You are not alone. The good news is you can learn how to control your anger & still express yourself. You'll learn skills, understand where it comes from, and know how to express it in a healthy manner. Anger is a signal that you can listen to and learn from without destroying yourself or others.

What if you didn't have an anger problem? Are you holding back and constantly giving? You do this so much that you finally can't take it anymore and you explode. If that described you I can help. Too often people think that their anger is out of control when it isn't true. What is happening is you hold back on small irritations until it builds up. I can show you how to recognize this and stop before you explode.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Clients can explore and resolve past experiences which may be contributing to an amplification of negative feelings in trigger situations causing tension and distressing emotions and body sensations. Resolving underlying emotional issues related to present anger can help to be able to safely express anger that a client may not have been able to get in touch with before.

You don’t have to feel angry all the time. Sometimes anger is obvious, and causes emotional, family and legal issues. Sometimes anger is less obvious, resulting in self-destructive or passive-aggressive behaviors. While you are learning about the source of your anger and in order to heat you must develop techniques to keep the anger from boiling over into rage. Talking and exploring ways to redirect potentially destructive behaviors and thoughts relieves the anger and promotes healing and healthy emotions

Anger management is a growing problem in our culture. I utilize both individual and group therapy to help people learn to deal with their own anger and the anger of others. People are often convinced their anger is a good thing, until they lose important relationships or get fired from jobs. The first thing I do is show them the many ways their anger is harming them and others. I use many techniques to do this, including analysis, confrontation, video, role play and practice with constructive communication. In time they learn to express themselves in ways that resolve rather than inflame situations.

The goal of anger management is to control the anger before it controls you by reducing your emotional and physical responses to situations that trigger outbursts. At Emerge, you’ll learn to manage the intensity of your thoughts, behaviors and actions since that is all that you have control over. You can’t change the people or environments that cause you to feel enraged, but you can change yourself and identify when to remove yourself from the situations that are triggers. If you feel you’re becoming angry more easily and having low frustration tolerance, you can benefit from anger management. The first step is understanding that there is help available and reaching out for the support in order to make the change.

Anger is a natural reaction to a hurtful or threatening situation. When it becomes uncontrollable, constant, and extreme, unhealthy anger can wreak havoc on our lives. Some people can manage anger with self-taught techniques, reading materials, and other resources. Yet, anger management therapy is considered the most effective treatment option to address these anger issues and adopt healthy coping strategies to handle them when they arise.

One of the main tools I use with people to help them control anger, is mindfulness. Anger is a normal emotion; we all know what it feels like. No one can help how they feel, but they can certainly control what they do with these feelings. Mindfulness is a way to help people understand what is happening for them in the moment. Teaching people to stop and pause, as they become more aware of what is happening for them, is a way to help them make different choices, rather than jumping into the same patterns which have not been useful in their lives. There are other behavioral skills clients can use as well, but it all starts with slowing the process down and awareness of what is happening.

Anger management therapy can be transformative for individuals struggling to control their anger. It offers tools to understand triggers, recognize early signs of anger, and respond in healthier ways. Techniques such as relaxation exercises, cognitive restructuring, and problem-solving are taught to manage anger effectively. It also provides a safe space for individuals to explore underlying issues that may contribute to anger, like past trauma or unmet needs. By fostering emotional intelligence, self-awareness, and better communication skills, anger management therapy can lead to improved relationships, personal growth, and enhanced life satisfaction.

The benefit of my approach is that instead of getting angry you will learn how to think and react creatively so you are better able to find a way to prevail in the long run. People and life will sometimes do you in and obstruct you. However, you are rarely at your best when angry. It is your beliefs that lead to your self-defeating feelings of anger. I show how an angry response leads you to have far less leverage than if you felt healthy negative feelings like great annoyance, frustration, displeasure and disappointment. I teach you how to think about injustice, interference, and insult so that you stay in control of your reactions in order to creatively respond and ultimately prevail!

Anger is a universal emotion. Anger that results in aggressive behaviors, acting out, or is interfering with living a healthy lifestyle is problematic. I will help you learn techniques to manage your angry feelings by working with you in identifying and modifying the thoughts you have that lead to angry behavior. As a result, you will learn healthier ways of coping with the triggers of your anger, and experience healthier ways of being .