Anger Management and Counseling in Saddle Brook, NJ.

We feel anger because we feel that something is not fair, something is not working out the way we thought it should, our boundaries have been crossed, or we feel we have been treated badly, or missed out. Anger can be frustrating if you don't know how to address the underlying issue. I specialize in helping those whose anger is related to social anxiety, isolation, bullying, harassment or lack of important social skills.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwaive optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161

Do you find you have difficulty managing outbursts of anger? Or are you more prone to bottling your anger and sitting on it for hours or weeks on end allowing it to fester? Both of these are common responses to anger, and neither are beneficial. Anger management therapy can benefit you by helping you to learn that you can control the way in which you respond to your anger. Through exploring the underlying reasons for your anger you will gain useful knowledge to help you recognize your triggers. Furthermore, through mindfulness and cognitive behavioral approaches you will learn to channel your anger in a more productive way.

I provide individual psychotherapy for anger management. Anger is normal emotion that everyone experiences. It becomes a problem when one expresses anger inappropriately or one lacks the proficiency to express any emotions but anger. I use Humanistic and Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) to help my clients understand their anger, improve their emotional experience, and express their emotions in healthy ways. A healthy emotional life is the cornerstone of living a full and successful life.

By helping individuals connect their irrational beliefs to their ineffectual and sometimes violent consequence, you will learn to take control of your anger and not allow it to control you. Using the ABC's of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy we will explore how activating events in your life and your belief systems or your schema trigger your emotional and behavioral consequences. Additionally, using a pulse oximeter we will explore the effects of anger on your body and learn how to de-flood your system while learning self soothing techniques.

Clients can explore and resolve past experiences which may be contributing to an amplification of negative feelings in trigger situations causing tension and distressing emotions and body sensations. Resolving underlying emotional issues related to present anger can help to be able to safely express anger that a client may not have been able to get in touch with before.

Our credentialed music therapists tailor sessions to each individual, utilizing personalized music exercises and interventions to address each person's unique experiences of anger. Our music therapists work with each client using musical elements like songwriting, processing, and guided imagery to help clients find their own voice and learn new coping skills to help manage anger of any severity.

One of the main tools I use with people to help them control anger, is mindfulness. Anger is a normal emotion; we all know what it feels like. No one can help how they feel, but they can certainly control what they do with these feelings. Mindfulness is a way to help people understand what is happening for them in the moment. Teaching people to stop and pause, as they become more aware of what is happening for them, is a way to help them make different choices, rather than jumping into the same patterns which have not been useful in their lives. There are other behavioral skills clients can use as well, but it all starts with slowing the process down and awareness of what is happening.

Anger management is a growing problem in our culture. I utilize both individual and group therapy to help people learn to deal with their own anger and the anger of others. People are often convinced their anger is a good thing, until they lose important relationships or get fired from jobs. The first thing I do is show them the many ways their anger is harming them and others. I use many techniques to do this, including analysis, confrontation, video, role play and practice with constructive communication. In time they learn to express themselves in ways that resolve rather than inflame situations.

I work with anger management for anger that is not physically abusive and not required by the courts. We will look at the root causes - is this a way that you keep others at bay? Are there other ways to cope with anger? Is this an approach to conflict that you learned in your family? We will talk about your thoughts, experiences, and expectations regarding conflicts. I will help you to understand and articulate the cause your anger so that you are less likely to feel out of control.

I believe children must first want to learn and perfect anger management. I have developed techniques to motivate the child or teen to develop a value system of respectful behavior toward others. Once this is achieved anger management skills can easily be obtained. Without a change in attitude and values, anger management training will fail because the child lacks the motivation to practice such techniques.

I help clients become more conscious and less reactive in their interactions. I teach clients specific strategies to break destructive patterns of relating and give them tools to communicate effectively. I also teach clients how to self-soothe. Within the safety of the therapeutic relationship, clients will explore the root of their anger and underlying emotions that are being expressed as anger or rage.