Great Couples Counselling in Mill Bay, BC. Therapy to heal relationships.

Dr Sloat's couples counselling is based on the belief that we are all in this world to be happy, and in order to be happy we must have our needs met. When in relationships, people sometimes fail to get their needs met, and when this happens there is conflict and discord. Dr Sloat helps people to clarify and articulate their needs in relation to their partners, and thus facilitates harmony between them. She does not take sides, but instead focuses on helping partners to renegotiate and/or redefine their relationships such that they become viable on both sides. Also see - http://CouplesCounsellingVictoria.info

Thinking about getting married? Not the marriage type? Together learn more about yourself and the other you want to be with as we explore hopes, dreams, values, and beliefs. Master the art of negotiation and compromise in conflict, as well as the maintenance of healthy boundaries around those "big deal-breaker" issues. Couples of all types of configurations will learn about being an ally for each other as we work towards respect, love, collaborative problem solving and mutual understanding.

My experience is that we all have a deep and powerful urge to bond emotionally with another who will offer us safety and acceptance. Our first experiences of love and attachment in our families set the scene and form our future expectations and sense of deserving (or not) of care and care-taking. Our Couples and Relationship work will be informed by Sue Johnson's "Emotionally Focused Therapy". We will explore each partner's early experiences of attachment. Slowly and gently we will work toward how to re-capture and ignite the flame of love, care and wonder that first drew you to the other.

Couples have been studied extensively by amongst others Gottman, and this information helps us to look at where you are, to get a sense of the gaps that exist, and to explore systematically what is possible. If you find that you are fighting all the time, have lost confidence, want to hurt your partner, and you are miserable and feeling alone, you need to step back and take a fresh look. Many couples waste precious time in unsolvable power struggles resulting in broken communication and automatic negative responses. Although you may feel hopeless and don't know what to do, couples do manage to change every day. This is often hard to do and takes time, but can also be magical and rewarding.

Shelley helps couples to enhance their communication, create safety and connection, heal past hurts and frustrations, and restore passion and playfulness. Through the Intentional Dialogue couples learn how to hear each other's perspective with compassion and empathy. With Shelley's guidance, couples can gain more understanding and awareness about the conflicts, and explore the dynamics that are stopping them from getting the love that they want. Couples learn to focus on the positive aspects of each other, and build on the strengths of their relationship, as well as work through the issues, in a safe and connected way, which promotes healing and growth.

Couples can mean a lot of things: a romantic couple, two siblings, a parent/child, or even two friends struggling to connect. Love so often gets buried in untold stories, repressed needs, and personal insecurities. We all long to connect with each other, be accepted for who we are by those we love and yet often we don’t know how to give or receive love because we were never taught. I provide a safe space for partners to really hear and see each other, so they may learn to connect better. I may use concepts from internal family systems, emotionally-focused couples therapy or the Gottmans to help guide the process. Ready to improve your relationship? Let’s get started.

The Gottman Method helps couples break out of painful cycles by applying research from over 3,000 couple-- studying both those who thrive and those who divorce—to identify what makes relationships work. In Gottman couples therapy, we'll identify patterns eroding your intimacy—like criticism, defensiveness, or stonewalling—and replace them with healthier ways of relating. You'll learn practical, evidence-based skills for expressing needs, listening deeply, navigating conflict constructively, and repairing hurt. Whether experiencing frequent arguments, feeling disconnected, or facing major challenges, you'll gain concrete tools to rebuild connection, taking your relationship in a new direction

All couples, gay, heterosexual, lesbian, or Bi-sexual are respectfully welcomed. Most frequent issues presented by all couples include sexuality, financial struggles, parenting issues and communication problems. Sexuality probably presents as the most common concern. Some issues are polyamory, impotence, lack of desire, sexual addiction, indidelity, sexual trauma and abuse and incest. Dr. Graham's clients find her easy to talk to and discussion is frank and respectful. Some couples are struggling with questions concerning whether or when to have children and infertily. Most couples have the goal to strengthen their bond but others need support to end an unhappy relationship.

i have over 30 years dealing with couples issues and have facilitated many healing relationships. The focus of this work is on recognizing some of the communications that create distance and resentments because members of a couple resort to protecting themselves from fear or pain rather than opening to the truth of what they are experiencing. Once a couple recognizes the value of sharing what is really going on and exploring their differences the intimacy and love returns. I also facilitate an active listening process where each person really listens to the other person without interupting or contradicting. After a bit of practise many couples report that this promotes postive changes.

Many couples struggle with communication and "feeling heard". Over time a once happy and vibrant relationship can begin to decay through hurt feelings, anger, lack of attention, feeling valued, infidelity, the strain of children, childhood issues, and much more. We focus to heal the wounds of the past and rebuild the love and trust within the relationship. We work to equip both partners with a voice and ability to effectively listen and hear one another. We will work together to establish individual boundaries within the relationship, while creating a stronger and healthier connection. Our goal is to equip each couple with the tools they require for success, independent of counselling

Couples therapy with me offers a safe, respectful space to untangle conflict, rebuild connection and strengthen your relationship. Whether you're struggling with communication, trust, or feeling distant, we'll work together to understand what's beneath the surface and create new ways of relating. I support both partners with compassion and curiousity, helping you feel heard and valued. Through honest conversation and practical tools, you can move from stuck patterns toward deeper intimacy, understanding and shared growth -- one conversation at a time.

Couples seek counselling for multiple reasons – from fighting and frustration to affairs or intimacy. Sometimes partners sense their relationship could just be better. Virtually all challenged relationships can be improved with better communications. Together we will explore and expand our communication skills, and practice them in a supportive and safe environment. Talking through the personal issues that each partner brings to the relationship can help couples build intimacy and grow closer.

Couples seek counselling for a variety of reasons. Life brings an assortment of challenges, and it can be difficult to know how to support each other along the way. Our circumstances, family structure, families of origin, busy schedules, childcare, and career demands are just a few of stressors that couples find themselves navigating. I’ll work with you to understand your unique challenges. I'll help you find new strength in your relationship so that you can face today’s, and tomorrow’s, challenges together. Contact today to schedule a free 15 minute consultation.