Great Couples Counselling in Shawnigan Lake, BC. Therapy to heal relationships.

I specialize in working with couples who are challenged by their adult child's behaviours/mental health and/or addiction. Having an adult kiddo who isn't quite launched, or who struggles to "adult", can cause much embarrassment and shame and it is rarely talked about openly. The secret is that this scenario is far from uncommon. I bring my years of experience of both developing and running groups for "affected others" to my practice of supporting couples as they navigate how to support without enabling. I offer suggestions on how and when to set realistic boundaries. I aim to reduce the guilt couples feel about living a good life while their adult child is struggling.

Many couples struggle with communication and "feeling heard". Over time a once happy and vibrant relationship can begin to decay through hurt feelings, anger, lack of attention, feeling valued, infidelity, the strain of children, childhood issues, and much more. We focus to heal the wounds of the past and rebuild the love and trust within the relationship. We work to equip both partners with a voice and ability to effectively listen and hear one another. We will work together to establish individual boundaries within the relationship, while creating a stronger and healthier connection. Our goal is to equip each couple with the tools they require for success, independent of counselling

The Gottman Method helps couples break out of painful cycles by applying research from over 3,000 couple-- studying both those who thrive and those who divorce—to identify what makes relationships work. In Gottman couples therapy, we'll identify patterns eroding your intimacy—like criticism, defensiveness, or stonewalling—and replace them with healthier ways of relating. You'll learn practical, evidence-based skills for expressing needs, listening deeply, navigating conflict constructively, and repairing hurt. Whether experiencing frequent arguments, feeling disconnected, or facing major challenges, you'll gain concrete tools to rebuild connection, taking your relationship in a new direction

Relationship are complicated and can be difficult. Each partner has had an upbringing, and life experiences that have shaped their values and outlook on life. These may differ from the outlook and values of their partner. Each partner also has their own methods of coping: direct, avoiding, exploding, running, and retreating. As your counsellor, I will help you both explore how your similarities help and hinder your relationship. You will gain a better understanding of why you and your partner 'do what you do'. You will learn effective ways of communicating, problem solving, managing emotions and conflict; in an effort for you both to achieve respect and love.

What are the most common couples' issues? If you are thinking "communication, conflict, sex, money, child rearing" you are correct. However, most therapists will go after the symptom on each side of the couple fence thinking that the way to effective change is by getting each party to "work" on their respective "issue". Many times the parties don’t agree but comply. Imagine if you could align the unconscious brains of a couple and stop the "working on your issues" part that has become so popular in therapy settings? Contact kevin@kevinflemingphd.com to learn how! Or call 877-606-6161. DR. FLEMING'S NEW RELATIONSHIP/COUPLES INTENSIVES. www.kevinflemingphd.com/marriage-couples-retreats.php

Healing and growing in our sexuality & eroticism can help us understand ourselves and our partners in ways we may have never been privileged to before. It opens us to the appreciation of the full depth and breadth of human erotic expression. I work with individuals and couples. My approach is informed by training as an Erotic Blueprint Coach, somatic attachment and conscious kink. All forms of love, relationship structures, and sexual expression welcome. I offer EMDR and other trauma processing approaches to support you in your healing when appropriate.

Seeking counselling for your relationship can bring you more clarity about habitual patterns, about your individual self and about your direction to move forward. I provide a safe and confidential place for you and your partner to talk to each other, explore your concerns and to be understood by each other. Sometimes this can involve learning communication skills to help you navigate conversations, tools to manage strong emotions and setting goals.

Did you know that couples and marriage counselling can have a positive impact on your relationship? It's not just for couples who are struggling, but also for those who want to strengthen their bond and communication skills. By seeking professional help, you can learn effective strategies to resolve conflicts, improve intimacy, and foster a deeper understanding of each other. Take the first step towards a healthier and happier relationship today. Contact me to learn more about our couples and marriage counselling services.

My experience is that we all have a deep and powerful urge to bond emotionally with another who will offer us safety and acceptance. Our first experiences of love and attachment in our families set the scene and form our future expectations and sense of deserving (or not) of care and care-taking. Our Couples and Relationship work will be informed by Sue Johnson's "Emotionally Focused Therapy". We will explore each partner's early experiences of attachment. Slowly and gently we will work toward how to re-capture and ignite the flame of love, care and wonder that first drew you to the other.

For a relationship to really thrive, both people in the relationship need to thrive. I focus on the personal growth of each individual in the couple as the foundation for a healthy and happy life together. By bringing out the unique gifts and qualities of each person, the relationship can have its best chances. Once both people are ready for the work of couples therapy, we can work on communication, intimacy, vulnerability, availability, balance, and showing up for each other.

i have over 30 years dealing with couples issues and have facilitated many healing relationships. The focus of this work is on recognizing some of the communications that create distance and resentments because members of a couple resort to protecting themselves from fear or pain rather than opening to the truth of what they are experiencing. Once a couple recognizes the value of sharing what is really going on and exploring their differences the intimacy and love returns. I also facilitate an active listening process where each person really listens to the other person without interupting or contradicting. After a bit of practise many couples report that this promotes postive changes.

Couples have been studied extensively by amongst others Gottman, and this information helps us to look at where you are, to get a sense of the gaps that exist, and to explore systematically what is possible. If you find that you are fighting all the time, have lost confidence, want to hurt your partner, and you are miserable and feeling alone, you need to step back and take a fresh look. Many couples waste precious time in unsolvable power struggles resulting in broken communication and automatic negative responses. Although you may feel hopeless and don't know what to do, couples do manage to change every day. This is often hard to do and takes time, but can also be magical and rewarding.

Shelley helps couples to enhance their communication, create safety and connection, heal past hurts and frustrations, and restore passion and playfulness. Through the Intentional Dialogue couples learn how to hear each other's perspective with compassion and empathy. With Shelley's guidance, couples can gain more understanding and awareness about the conflicts, and explore the dynamics that are stopping them from getting the love that they want. Couples learn to focus on the positive aspects of each other, and build on the strengths of their relationship, as well as work through the issues, in a safe and connected way, which promotes healing and growth.