Great Couples Counseling in Upland, CA. Therapy to heal relationships.

Do you feel like you can't communicate with your partner? Do you feel mistreated? Married or not, differences still exist and can be dealt with. You're not alone! We create a custom made system that fits your life to bring the greatest results. We use a test to discover your temperament and find where the differences are. Call us now to see how we can help you repair your relationship and live happy.

Couples therapy should not be about hashing over old wounds. Getting what you want from a relationship involves good communication and active listening, tolerance and forgiveness, emotional intelligence, having common goals and working cooperatively and, like all the bets things in life, presents us with a challenge. Relationships can be hard work but the work is rewarding and life-enhancing. I love to work with couples who are committed to improving their future rather than reliving their past.

Many people can benefit from couples therapy sessions, even if their relationships do not have obvious problems. People often wait until very late in the game before seeking help, often times after one or both have already decided to end the relationship. Seeking the help of a psychologist can strengthen the behavioral and emotional bonds that keep couples together. Couples therapy changes the way that couples behave with each other. Sessions focus on improving interactions and building resilience. By focusing on the “Three C’s” of intimacy (closeness, communication, and commitment), partners learn how to achieve intimacy with their romantic partners rather than isolation

The purpose of couples therapy is to restore an enhanced level of functioning in couples who experience relationship distress. This distress can result in poor communication skills, incompatibility, or a broad spectrum of psychological disorders that include domestic violence, alcoholism, depression, anxiety or other issues. You should be advised that honesty, providing all necessary information, cooperation, keeping appointments on time, and a sincere desire for change and improvement are all imperative to increase your chances of a successful outcome. Additionally, a willingness to work "towards" and "with" the process of treatment is essential. When you call me to begin the process, we learn about your relationship's traits and work together to...(view profile to read more)

The general goal is to reduce conflict and increase intimacy. In the safety of therapy, and with a trained professional as a third party, you each will have the opportunity to learn about yourself in depth, in addition to gaining insights into the complex dynamics of your relationship. The increasing of knowledge, communication skills, and relational tools can combine to create the intimacy and connection that is so necessary in marriage.

Couples counseling is becoming more common since people are postponing marriage and choosing to live together, before marriage. Both choices have there difficulties, and we are equipped to work with people who are at any stage in their relationship. We guide clients toward their goals, educating them to better understand the reasons they are having difficulty.

As a Marriage and Family Therapist I am a relationship expert and delight in helping couples to see past their differences to their desire to make their relationship a safe and enjoyable place. I am trained in Emotionally Focused Couples' Therapy (EFT.) Of all the currently used theories regarding couples' therapy, EFT has the best outcomes for couples with 7:10 couples showing improvement over a three-year period.

Let me guess. One partner feels alone and like they don't matter and the other feels they are always being criticized and can't get anything right. The more one asks for the other to show up, the more the partner disappears physically and emotionally. You both bicker and fight and the idea of sitting and just hanging out seems elusive, if not impossible. Something like this? Often we crave connection but are blocked by the pain and the history that gets in the way. Small fights about little things become battles that highlight our struggle to have our basic relational needs met. I can help you get under the bickering to the parts crying out for connection- to an enriching relationship.

Many of us can remember the frustrations, hurts, and joys experienced in a loving relationship. Often couples can become confused with the variety of emotions and complicated interpersonal interactions. A counselor can help a couple avoid the pitfalls that can destroy a relationship and help a couple to establish healthy bonding and boundaries within effective communication to enhance and maintain a healthy relationship. For those in an unhealthy relationship, counseling can help an individual understand their need for change, setting boundaries, and maintaining safety for themselves and for other family members.

Using a combination of Gottman Method Couples Therapy as well as Sue Johnson's Emotionally Focused Couples therapy, I will help you and your partner identify your problem areas and negative cycles that keep you stuck and support your relationship moving back into a pattern of ease and intimacy. We will support increased core emotion expression, identification of each individual's needs, breaking down old negative habits, and reconstructing new habits that will keep your connection strong for the long term. Let's discuss your needs today in a free consultation.

Without conflict, couples do not achieve intimacy. The challenge is helping you and your partner learn how to have healthy conflict that leads to intimacy, rather than destructive conflict that destroys the relationship. While I work with all couples, I specialize in working with neuro-diverse couples. I usually start with helping you learn ground rules for being able to have safe, constructive, healthy conflict to reduce and eliminate destructive relational patterns. I also use Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT) to help you reconnect, learn healthy communication skills, rekindle the flame that you once had, and start talking to each other again. If you are willing to work, I am here for you!

Couples counseling is a wonderful opportunity to truly connect. Learning new ways of bonding with our partners is much easier than you may think and I believe it is truly a must in any relationship. I don't want to force partners in but rather encourage them to see the potential that exists within your relationship. My reality over the years is that you are going to get stuck at some point. That's ok. We just need to help you through it. Individual needs cannot be sacrificed and truly do not have to be. Let's see what we can do together.

I have been helping couples heal their relationships for more than 29 years. Effective therapy includes developing a clear understanding of the different family "cultures" couples have been raised in, and a clear perspective of how early hurts and pain can be re-triggered by the current marital or couple relationship. Communication skills are essential for working through chronic or immediate pain a couple is experiencing together--and empathy for the each other's perspective is at the heart of those skills. It is also essential to know when a relationship has the potential to open up and grow, and when development together is no longer currently possible due to abuse or excessive hostility

Most couples come in seeking better communication. I will work with you to communicate effectively and in a manner that is respectful and compassionate in regards to your significant other's own story. Together we will look at your style of connecting or not connecting with one another and work to increase connection. I also work successfully with many couples who experience infidelity and are seeking to re-build their relationship. Pre-marital counseling is available for couples who are thinking of marrying or on their way to the altar.

My approach couples therapy is to help initiate change and nurture development in intimate relationships between couples. My usual goals of family therapy are improving the communication, solving deeper relational problems, understanding and handling special family situations, and creating a better functioning home environment. I use a psychodynamic sytematic approach to treatment to help the couple get a better understanding of healthy boundaries and relational patterns and dynamics; Enhanced communication; Improved problem solving; Deeper empathy;Reduced conflict and better anger management skills.

Affordable couples workshops are offered once a month! Couples want to raise their relationship to a HIGHER LEVEL OF LOVE! Today there are tools to guide couples to improve communication, learn how to be a team, resolve problems without escalating, and regain their sexual desire, attraction and passion, when they both feel heard, supported and close. When relationships become stuck at a lower level of love couples lost desire and attraction, can't communicate with depth, and feel like adversaries on opposite teams! We build our whole lives on love, why settle! Dr. Wheeler has written several books (on amazon) that teach couples tools for heart-centered love!

Why do we seem to have the same arguments over and over again? How do I know if we are really supposed to be together? Are there things we could be doing to better support each other, to help each other grow and be our best selves? If we really love each other, why do we so often hurt each other? How do I know if this is real love, anyway? Relationships are hard. Even more than desire, they require effort and understanding to make them work. Often, even if two people really love each other, one or both may need help to maintain the right effort or understanding to keep the balance necessary for long-term success. Having outside, objective support can make all the difference.

If your marriage is in serious trouble, or if you just want to make it better ... don't wait. I offer a unique marriage counseling program designed to get to know your partner on a deeper level and get beyond old hurts. Homework is given weekly. A professional working with couples will help first to clarify the main issue brought to the first session. Usually there is much more going on between two people, and a therapist will help the two dig alittle deeper. Maybe old anger is a roadblock....or resentments. Unforgiveness is a big stummbling block. You will decide what you want to change, improve upon, and goals you wish to obtain for your relationship.

Couples may they be in a dating relationship, living together, engaged to marry, married, in business together, separating, divorcing, fighting over children, property, alimony or visitation, are often confronted with a breakdown in communication and an inability to resolve conflicts. Couple counseling aims to reveal the disconnect within a couple that often once had the ability to connect and function in harmony. Couples can quickly get off track with one another and need skilled guidance to help them learn to resolve conflicts, once again listen and communicate effectively as well as to be able to disagree without forcing the relationship to end.

Your primary relationship should be a "recharging station" to recover from the stresses of everyday life. When your relationship is the SOURCE of your stress, it can be an overwhelming problem. Oftentimes, the stress leads to angry outbursts, addictive behaviors, dishonesty, and even infidelity. The good news is, that if the partners are motivated, amazing progress can be made. Our first task is to reduce tension so communication and trust can be restored. I provide objectivity in a balanced atmosphere. And trust me, over the course of my career working with couples, I've heard everything - your problems are probably more common than you think. You CAN overcome them!

In my Couples Counseling work I help partners build on the strengths of their relationship while we work together to create new skills for communicating and solving problems. My approach is collaborative and I teach each partner to learn how to listen and hear what the other is expressing and needing as well as ways to be heard and understood better. I provide a safe place where difficult problems can be discussed and solutions explored and practiced so that couples can better resolve ongoing problems.