Anger Management and Counseling in San Diego, CA.

Anger is a normal human emotion. The manner in which individuals exhibit their emotions, particularly anger can be constructive or destructive. If individuals are able to constructively channel their anger, the experience and management of anger leads to neutral or positive outcomes. However, if an individual manifests their anger in a unhealthy manner, it can negatively affect any facet of their lives from their personal relationships to their professional lives. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is key to learning to effectively manage anger. With this approach, clients learn to identify and substitute unhealthy trigger thoughts with healthy thoughts and to utilize anger-reducing strategies.

If you have been confronted by others that you have a "problem with anger", it certainly is worth taking a look. What most people don't know, is that those struggling with anger management are most often merely reacting to stress, anxiety, shame, fear, or depression. In men, depression is often experienced more as irritability than as sadness. While you may not know how to make the change others are asking for, be assured that with the right help, you certainly can make very meaningful change, and enjoy the result. Don't for a moment think that controlling your anger means you don't get to be heard. You will enjoy the experience of really being heard and respected.

I provide individual psychotherapy for anger management. Anger is normal emotion that everyone experiences. It becomes a problem when one expresses anger inappropriately or one lacks the proficiency to express any emotions but anger. I use Humanistic and Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) to help my clients understand their anger, improve their emotional experience, and express their emotions in healthy ways. A healthy emotional life is the cornerstone of living a full and successful life.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

I specialize in Anger Management. Controlling anger can be a challenge. Anger is a protective response that indicates some kind of violation has occurred. It is a secondary emotion, meaning that there is always a more vulnerable feeling underneath such as hurt or sadness. It is helpful to learn how to express the primary emotion underneath the anger. It is also helpful to learn strategies to be able to take a break and walk away before things get out of control. There are usually triggers that get activated in the present but are fueled from the past. I also use techniques to help release the anger from the original event so that you can respond more calmly in the present.

Rightful anger has an important place in life where and when it must be expressed. However, there are many forms of anger that are internally destructive and can become externally dangerous to ourselves and others. Some forms of anger come from long term contentious relationships and occurrences which can never go away or decrease in pain and agitation. Some forms of anger are explosive on the moment and other anger comes as a gradual escalating irritation that then reaches its limits. Counseling serves to teach skills of anger management and can defuse and even prevent out of control anger from erupting. Counseling is known to be very effective for addressing and safely controlling anger.

Anger can control our lives and destroy relationships. Often anger is an emotional response to unmet needs in our lives, sometimes beginning from when we were children. I work with my clients to help them recognize their unmet needs, the source of their anger, and to identify the different kinds of anger they may be experiencing. At the same time, we work to together in a safe and non-judgmental environment to learn how to manage anger, focusing on one's own responsibility and building a healthy sense of self.

Often anger is a form of protest of some injustice that has been done. The adaptive action tendency when one is flooded with anger is to help one assert themselves with an advocacy of self in healthy ways. Managing your anger vs. having your anger manage you is a way to be in healthy control of yourself which will benefit your close relationships with others and within yourself.

Anger can stem from many sources and momentary or brief bouts of anger are normal ways of generating the energy to defend and protect oneself and one's family. But when anger and outbursts are out of proportion to a situation, or are frequent or too easily provoked, then anger can be a serious problem. Managing anger just as managing other strong emotions is done by first recognizing the early signals or triggers, such as unfairness, feeling offended, intrusions, or frustration. Then to develop alternative ways to respond, such as postponing or delaying a response, or rapid self-calming.