Great Couples Counselling in Havelock, ON. Therapy to heal relationships.

Couples are 2 people with different bodies and different life experiences, who are working together. This is an incredibly challenging task! Finding a meeting place that reminds you of your connection, as well as a place to heal wounds, is helpful to repair and to grow. I hope to facilitate this process in a safe, respectful space, where all people are heard, seen, respected and understood. Couples therapy can be extremely helpful in the early stages of a relationships, to strengthen communication, connection and resolve patterns prior to them becoming ingrained. I can also help with the process of separation. I welcome ALL couples into my practice including polyamorous, LGBTQ+

I provide couples counselling, because I believe in couples. Whether you are dating, common law, or married - problems can arise even when two people care and love each other. We work together seeing the couple and the individuals to work with the whole package, strengthening and adapting so you can form the foundation, skills and relationship you desire. Let's work together on the problematic areas so we can become better together.

Couples therapy is a collaborative approach and a safe space to communicate how you feel. Marriage and couples counseling tends to deal with present-day events rather than the past. It focuses on the 'now' and the challenges of married life so that you can get your relationship back on track. Couples therapy deals with the present day but also any history that causes unhealthy patterns of relating. Using the Gottman Method, I focus on communication and conflict resolution and what areas need improvement where we will then learn about creating new connections and rituals. We will also focus on building new meanings and shared value systems that will help you strengthen your relationshi

Couples coming to counselling are asked to be honest about their own motivation levels, skepticism and hopes for therapy as part of the assessment. Problems are initially identified in both one on one sessions, and then lead into mutual encounters which are guided to elicit authentic feelings and engender empathy, understanding & appreciation. If a relationship is badly damaged (such as by infidelity) exercises for unraveling contempt are presented. Often in couples work, individuals become aware of certain cultural, inter-generational or early life patterns that get played out and learn strategies to manage them. When a relationship has run its course the work may be about "farewell".

Couples are supported to communicate more clearly with each other, as well as learn more positive communication skills, see the strengths in each other, and in the relationship. They will be encouraged to work on breaking down old, unhealthy habits and beliefs, and build healthy, positive relationship habits, that bring them together for deeper connection and bonding.

Couples therapy is not just for times of trouble, it is also important for building a strong foundation to an already strong relationship. Our couples therapists focus on learning about your unique relationship and what each of you bring to the table. We tailor this process to what your relationships needs, which could be healing from a trauma, infidelity, loss, and/or life stress. We are here to help and to support your relationship.

In providing couples therapy I follow the approach of Stan Tatkin. Stan Tatkin work focuses on helping a couple notice their reactions to their partner and learn how to support each other in their attachment needs. In part this approach is focuses on arousal regulation, current and past attachments, how our brain fires in relationships. The focus in this approach is on the couple and the “couple’s bubble”. Some of this work can include reflecting and managing the “thirds” in a relationship, i.e. others that impede or impact on the couple’s bond. I welcome you in contacting me for a free consultation session before setting up your couple’s therapy appointment.

Relationships can be hard but they do not have to be. Our couple's therapists work with the couples to identify problem areas, debunk, assumptions, and learn how to effectively communicate. Your therapist will help you to express your feelings in a respectively way, discuss issues, and resolve conflicts that are occurring. Couple's therapy aims to increase respect, affection, understanding, and intimacy between you and your partner. Our therapists stay neutral and focus on the couple as a unit rather than individually someone being "right" and someone being "wrong".

I have experience working within non-monogamous/open/poly(amorous, affective, fidelity) contexts. When considering couple/family counselling, it is important that everyone is open to the idea because it can be difficult work. Counselling with an intimate partner/s can be slow going but, usually, the goal is the development of a ‘communications toolkit’ that can be used in the longterm without further mediation. Couples/family counselling can also be valuable in the shorter term to resolve one or more specific conflicts or to break out of existing unhealthy dynamics thereby renewing respectful communication.

Difficulties can arise in intimate relationships and can be challenging to resolve. Couple therapy can help you talk about the issues in your relationship, better understand and process feelings and emotions that might lie behind the conflict or misunderstandings and find ways to reconnect, find common ground and meet your relationship goals. In your work with me, I aim to provide a safe space for you to openly share your thoughts and feelings while finding ways to be present and open to your partner’s experiences and perspectives. Schedule a free consultation with me to see if we are a good fit.

If you are in a relationship that is marked by conflict, chronic arguing, anger, frustration or feeling stuck in some way, counselling can give you some tools to help you move forward. If you are feeling emotionally disconnected or distant from your parter there are ways to reconnect with your loved one that can be quickly learned. If you have been impacted by addiction, particularly compulsive sexual behaviours, I can help you understand how to move forward in to new healthy patterns.

Healthy relationships take commitment & work. I help couples increase emotional intimacy & connection. I help them stop unhelpful ways of interacting, achieve resolution to their unresolved conflicts, & take responsibility for their negative contributions to patterns. Couple relationships require re-committing ourselves to each other repeatedly throughout the length of our relationship. I will help you to learn to "turn towards" one another. I will also help you to eliminate the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, a phrase coined by couple researches John and Julie Gottman. Lastly, all couple relationships include pursuer-distancer patterns. I will help you identify these and work to stop them.

I work with Couples who are committed to staying together. Every Couple will experience rocky times throughout their relationship, it is how they overcome challenges together that will keep their relationship healthy. I offer strategies and insights into how to understand each others ever changing needs, as well as helpful communication strategies to avoid miscommunication and unhelpful "mindgames".