Great Couples Counselling in West Vancouver, BC. Therapy to heal relationships.

Sue Johnson teaches in her emotion focussed therapy that there is a specific emotional process - a dance - that occurs between each couple. This cycle of relating (which can start with not getting one’s needs met and be followed by some protective response, for example), is largely informed by each partner’s early attachment wounds. When our relationship does not offer enough safety to be vulnerable, or when the more honest we are with our partner the more our connection is threatened, it’s time to reach out for support. In couples therapy we work to establish safety, vulnerability and connection, as well as learn the practical skills of effective communication and conflict resolution.

In November 2014 Kathryn recently completed Level One and Level Two Clinical Training of the Gottman Method Couples Therapy. This world renowned research based therapy was developed over 30 years with the participation of 3500 couples by Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Gottman. These powerful techniques have saved thousands of relationships and will surely benefit your relationship.

Charlene has over 10 years experience working with couples. Couples counselling can help to identify the problem issues that each couple is facing and provide them with effective tools to work through these issues. Couples counselling can improve communication between couples, teach couples how to fight fairly and to work together during difficult times. Call Charlene to discuss how she can help you and your partner find your way back to love.

Couples experience a number of challenges that get in the way of optimal relationship functioning. My role is to help families identify how each partner is supporting each other and what patterns are contributing to the “problem”. As a couples therapist, I provide a neutral third party perspective as to these patterns and we can explore the meaning or context behind them. Once we have identified what patterns are impacting the relationship we will develop strategies for more helpful patterns and responses. I utilize therapeutic interventions from the Gottman model, Emotionally-Focused Therapy, Attachment Theory, Response-Based Practice, and Narrative Therapy.

If you're looking to improve your relationship, we'd work together to create a supportive environment for discussion, allowing each of you to share your perspective and experience. With important conversations and empathetic questions, there's opportunity to truly see each other and to collaborate to resolve the issues rather than engaging in blame. Together, we'd uncover experiences that promote mutual understanding, empathy and appreciation. Through this process you'll gain insights, develop new ways of communicating, strengthen your connection and establish a more fulfilling and harmonious relationship.

Do you lie in bed looking at the ceiling thinking, "I just can't do this another day"? Are you seeking for ways out? Thinking of alternate life situations? Is looking at porn become a replacement for sex with your spouse? What about romance novels, are you stuck in a world of non-reality, wishing that prince charming would make his acquaintance, and do it fast! Do you hate the way you have to wean through his dirty socks to get to the bed...or deal with her city of bottles on your bathroom vanity counter? Have you breached your marriage vows with someone else, or sought the unhealthy friendship of someone from the opposite sex online or at the office? It is time to take the love back.

Intimate relationships are not easy. To have a fulfilling relationship, it takes the work of two people to build and sustain a loving, caring & harmonious relationship. I can help you to understand that there will always be arguments, but the arguments don't need to destroy your marriage. Together we can work on ways to resolve the reasons why you fight and to learn to talk to each other in ways that can help you understand each other. You and your partner have your unique views, beliefs and values. These will need to be discussed so you can both go forward creating the relationship you want. My approach is to work with you in a sensible & practical way to help you get a meaningful outcome.

A couple refers to two individuals in a relationship. We live each day as one half of a couple but often we struggle to find a way to maintain who we are, while actively working to be part of a duo. We work with you to establish healthy methods of communication and develop confidence in appropriately articulating what you need, how you experience love, and what is imperative for you to have a supportive, loving relationship.

When a couple comes to counselling, they are often desperate for help. They have usually been arguing and drifting farther and farther apart. They feel lonely and dissappointed in their relationship. It is my goal as an Emotionally Focused therapist to help couples identify their patterns and behaviors, so they can make better choices and see major improvement. Through therapy, you begin to understand how your behaviors have impacted your partner, and led to the creation of the emotional distance between you. In essence, I give couples the tools they need to feel closer and rediscover the connection and intimacy they thought was lost forever.

Relationship counselling focuses on the question "Why aren’t you having fun together?" Satisfying relationships require intimacy, honest communication, and interdependence. But sometimes they can seem like a Groundhog Day of bickering, criticizing, withdrawing, and frustration. I'm here to help clarify, demystify, and encourage you to speak frankly and listen deeply to each other. Is the message you’ve sent your partner the message that’s been received? Are you distinguishing freedom from license (interfering with the other's freedom, are demands disguised as boundaries? Through counselling, you can improve intimacy and communication, rebuild trust, and strengthen your emotional connection.

Do you look at your partner and wonder what happened to the sense of connection and intimacy that you once enjoyed? Have the stresses of life, career, and parenting gotten in the way of your relationship? Would you like to learn how to be heard and to hear what is really going on in your partner's heart of hearts? Couples counselling is an opportunity to re-connect and re-discover yourself and your partner. It is a safe forum to air difficult issues , develop skills for effective communication and enhance emotional and physical intimacy.

With training in the Gottman method, we work with couples helping them find new ways of repairing their relationship, and shifting their mindset to better understand each other’s needs. We work from a strength-based approach, providing insight into the relationship. We work with the couple to better understand each other and live in a relationship where they feel valued and strong.

As a Marriage Therapist, Couples counsellor and Sex Therapist, I specialize in helping couples experience more joy and connection in relationship. After completing a relationship assessment which will give you a concrete and very specific blueprint of your strengths as a couple as well as an outline of your individual experience of what isn't working I will help you develop very practical tools so you can change how you communicate, heal trust issues, create emotional safety and address Addiction, Anger or other issues. Resolving conflict and growing the love you have will allow you to develop a deeper intimate connection and rekindle the passion you once shared.

Relationships can become tense, defensive, and hostile. Sometimes, ruptures in trust occur that leave us questioning "should I still be with you?" When our relationships feel insecure, we react often through becoming critical/nagging, or shutting down and checking out. I practice a form of evidence-based couples therapy called Emotion-Focused Therapy for Couples (EFT). Through EFT, we identify the negative cycle that has come to define your relationship, and work to repair this ruptured attachment bond, helping partners feel safer and freer around one another. This leads to improved intimacy, better communication, and a stronger emotional connection.

Most people choose a partner who reminds them in a way of their parent/caretaker with whom they had an unsatisfying relationship. So often they try to re-play the past relationship in the present, and the two different scenarios usually interlock, resulting in re-enactment of the past relations. So, instead of having someone who will help 'heal our wounds', we end up with somebody reinjuring us through defensive behaviors. I use a 'mirroring' technique: it consists of helping the couple to paraphrase each other and then offer attuned empathic responses. What this means is that partner B is invited to make an emphatic statement to A about what he/she imagines A is feeling.