Anger Management and Counseling in Lennox, CA.

Anger is one of our fundamental emotions, part of the basic machinery of our mind and personality. In some ways it is a useful tool that helps to motivate and energize us in seeking fairness and justice in the world around us. But this powerful hold-over from our primal history can also be enormously destructive if we lose control of it. If your anger is slipping out of your control and you find yourself saying or doing things that damage your reputation or your relationships, hurt those around you, or otherwise consistently put you on the outside of society's expectations for behavior, you need help to find tools or strategies to change this and I would be happy to help.

Everybody gets angry. Anger is a human emotion which can serve both positive and negative ends which, in itself, is neutral. Frustration, fear, feeling threatened or treated unfairly can trigger an angry outburst in any animal. Anger is a normal human emotion. It can be an appropriate response to injustice, unfairness or discrimination. However, what we need to achieve is a way of expressing anger that is reasonable, measured and proportionate. Cognitive behavioral therapy provides one of many possible answers to managing anger. Feelings are often created by our thoughts and examining our thought processes to see if they are reasonable and rational can help us with emotional regulation.

I work closely with my clients and their families in identifying the triggers and body cues which preceed an anger episode. Focusing on being in touch with ones emotional experience prior to an outburst allows my clients to begin to identify and disrupt this behavioral pattern prior to a full meltdown. Behaviors are much easier to change before full escalation, and working with my clients and families on identifying these clues and implimenting effective coping strategies is a pivotal part of change.

Anger is not only something to "manage." The feelings in anger need to be recognized, understood, and responding to in a way that make sense. You're not bad because you are angry, you treat yourself and others badly when your trapped in intense feelings. I help people come out of the shame of being labeled in negative ways because they struggle with anger. Anger becomes less of a struggle when you're not alone in it.

I do not believe in "anger management". Instead, I believe in being in control of your emotions - including anger. My clients discover how to be in control of their feelings of anger or rage - instead of the anger or rage controlling them. My clients discover how they can feel anger, but then choose more effective and productive ways of expressing themselves - in ways that no longer lead to regret or hurt - but rather in ways they feel proud and good about.

Anger is usually triggered when individuals have difficulties verbally expressing their feelings of frustration. All those feelings can lead to a violent physical altercation due to not being release the undesirable anger thru the use of communication. With a therapist support, skills can be learned on how to manage your strong undesired feeling and release them in a healthy manner.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

As a culture, we do not do well with healthy expressions of anger. Often we are raised to suppress it and then we have limited practice at dealing with big emotion. There is a spectrum of healthy aggression- to keep us safe and to maintain boundaries- and rage- our body's strategy for safety. Anger management is about applying the right "dosing" to maintain boundaries yet not fracture relationships or suffer other losses. I am able to help you learn to regulate your body to be able to apply the appropriate "dose" to be effective and not destructive.

When will feel stuck in life we often feel anger. Our frustrations grow and we end up doing things we later regret, like yelling at our spouse, or children. We know we want to remain calm but our frstrations overtake us. If you are struggling with anger I can help. I understand how you can calm your emotions to take the actions that truly help your situation. Using evidence-based practices around emotion regulation you can respond in ways that help you and the ones you love.

Anger is very closely correlated to depression and is in fact one of its symptoms. When people get labeled as having "anger issues" I as a therapist suspect that there is some form of underlying depression and in most cases early childhood trauma. I use cognitive behavioral therapy, but I also use psycho-dynamic psychotherapy to get down to the root of the underlying reasons for the anger.

Are you accused of being angry? Is someone afraid of your anger? Are you being threatened into getting help for anger? At CCRG, we understand how YOU feel, and we can get people off your back. If you're willing to learn some approaches that work, you will find that others annoy you less, things go your way more often, and you'll be treated with respect and love. Wouldn't that be nice? Give us a call and just say you want help with what others call "anger."

Anger is a healthy expression of emotion. When anger and rage become the dominating emotion that rules our actions, a potentially serious problem exists. When this occurs we feel out of control, even frightened by the intensity of feeling. Scared by life altering actions and repercussions. We become lost and confused. We know this is not me but yet it is. This mystery is solvable. Sometimes when negative experiences happen we hide and bury them, We do this so well we forget why the anger is there. Over the years these experiences multiply, fester and grow. A time bomb waiting to be triggered. We can help you unearth the issues, defuse and help you to dismantle the bomb. Call! We can help.

I help clients learn self-regulation tools to manage their regressions. We explore relational histories that have contributed to steady-state regressions and the challenge of managing secondary emotions. Ultimately, my clients are able to find healing from their previously reactive behaviors and more adaptive ways of handling their emotions. The result is better relationships.