Anger Management and Counselling in Comox, BC.

If you have ADHD, you may notice that anger or frustration arises more quickly or intensely than you expect. This is common for adults with ADHD because the brain’s executive functioning and emotional regulation systems can make it harder to manage strong emotions, respond to stress, or pause before reacting. In therapy, I take a strength-based, affirming approach to help you understand these patterns and develop strategies, coping tools, and practical systems that work with your brain. Together, we’ll help you manage anger more effectively, respond to challenges with greater calm and clarity, and build emotional resilience while honoring your experience.

If a client comes to me with anger management, I would approach them with curiosity and examine the root cause of the anger. Depending on the source of the anger, I would determine what type of approach to use. For example if the anger was caused by a specific event, if the client agrees, we would explore that specific event in detail, as well as practical strategies to manage the existing anger. Approaches I use are Alderian therapy or EFT for treatment.

When anger gets the best of us, we can say and/or do things that we later wish we could change or take back. Anger is an instinctive universal emotion, one in which we all have, but not all expressions of anger have to be hurt. In fact, anger works as a great informant and can motivate us to take action to improve our own lives and the lives of people that we care about.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

If you find yourself snapping at loved ones and feeling awful afterward, I help you step back, understand what’s underneath your reactions, and respond with greater clarity and control. When you keep saying, “I should be able to handle this,” but can’t, I help you stop hiding and start healing. And if your relationships feel like walking on eggshells, I guide you toward deeper trust, safer communication, and genuine connection. Real change begins here.

Anger is called a secondary emotion, brought on by a triggering event and or thought. What I'm interested in was a therapist, is what is behind the trigger. What are the fears, the needs that aren't being met. By identifying different triggers, and the the triggering thoughts behind them, we can depersonalize a situation so that it simply becomes a problem to be solved, without fault or blame, and discover alternative thoughts and behaviours that lead a path to better choices, without shame or guilt.

Our anger can be a sentry, a protector and a wise indicator that our boundaries have been transgressed or that something vitally important to us is threatened. It can also be a raging tyrant, a short fuse, a simmering internalisation that off-gases through passive aggression, or a childish tantrum. Becoming intimate with our anger is synonymous with becoming intimidate with our power. In anger therapy, we will work to understand the unique way your anger process happens through somatic awareness, mindfulness and emotional intimacy. We will look at your history with anger, your family lineage, and you will learn tools to channel this fire in ways that support rather than hinder your life.

Anger is an emotion that we all have experienced – it is natural, normal and healthy. However if it gets to be too much it can become destructive and damaging to those around us and ourselves. It can lead to problems in our personal lives as well as at work and play. How we express our anger can be the key to learning to better manage our angry emotions. Anger is a biological reaction and yet we can learn to manage it better. We can learn to express what we are feeling and to use various calming strategies that help us to identify our triggers and learn to control our reactions. The benefits to learning manage our anger are endless and often life transforming.

At Soul Fire Counselling, we understand that managing anger can be a challenging journey, but you don't have to face it alone. Our personalized anger management program is designed to help you identify triggers, develop healthier coping strategies, and cultivate emotional resilience. Through a combination of evidence-based techniques and compassionate support, we empower you to transform anger into a positive force for change. Let us guide you towards a more balanced and peaceful life, where you can thrive emotionally and relationally.