Anger Management and Counselling in Bowen Island, BC.

Anger is a strong emotion and when not regulated in a healthy manner, it can impact us in different ways. It can impact the most important relationships in our lives, our work and even how we feel about ourselves. When working with anger, I want my clients to first listen to what anger is trying to tell them. Anger, like any other emotion, has a message for us. It might be trying to tell us something about the pains we have never dealt with, the boundaries in our lives that are being crossed, and the changes that we desire in our lives. Once we learn to your anger and hear it out, we will work on tools to regulate it better and express it constructively without suppressing it.

Anger can arise from a number of events in one's life. For some it is comes about from frustration and a lack of coping strategies, for others it is the culmination of many (sometimes divergent and seemingly unrelated) events, or it may be in reaction to changing life circumstances (e.g. loss of employment). I work first to help my clients understand the source of their angry behaviours, feelings, and thoughts, and then work with them to develop more effective ways of expressing their needs and dealing with other potential triggers. Leaving them feel a greater sense of control and strength.

People often confuse anger management with the impossible task of eliminating anger. Anger is a feeling, and, like all feelings, demands to be felt. My favourite line about this is, "Feelings are like sh--. They have to come out eventually." The key to anger management is to feel the anger, recognize it, and find ways to express and release it safely.

Learning to recognize your anger without acting impulsively is a challenge I can help you with. My approach to anger includes: • Learning to recognize and fully understand your anger triggers • Working with self-esteem—often feelings of shame or self-doubt exacerbate anger problems • Finding ways to express the energy of anger in healthy ways, like assertion rather than aggression, setting boundaries with kind firmness, breath, movement and energetic release • Practices tailored to you, for between sessions to integrate the new healthy ways you are finding in our sessions together

One of the greatest detriments of anger is that it makes us feel helpless and out of control. Anger management techniques aren't meant to eliminate your anger. Anger management techniques put you in charge of the situation and teach you how to make your anger work for you. Resolve conflict creatively, calm yourself before you hit the red zone, recognize the early warning signs of anger…so that you’ll stay in control of your emotions, offer and respond to criticism with confidence and react to a crisis calmly and confidently...so that you will be powerful instead of overpowering.

We feel anger because we feel that something is not fair, something is not working out the way we thought it should, our boundaries have been crossed, or we feel we have been treated badly, or missed out. Anger can be frustrating if you don't know how to address the underlying issue. I specialize in helping those whose anger is related to social anxiety, isolation, bullying, harassment or lack of important social skills.

We are all thoroughly emotional beings. We were not all fortunate enough to be coached from birth on how to handle our emotions, especially the big ones, like anger. My role is in helping you learn to regulate your feelings in order for those spikes of anger to become less overwhelming. It is never too late to integrate these skills.

We employ an integrative approach to assist our clients in gaining a deeper understanding of their emotions. Our primary goal is to eliminate the stigma surrounding anger by fostering a compassionate environment that encourages clients to explore the underlying meaning behind their anger. Through our guidance and support, we empower clients to express anger healthily and constructively.

I offer counselling for anger management to help clients manage difficult situations. The treatment process is rooted in CBT with a focus on identifying triggers and recognizing body sensations that indicate emotional dysregulation. Developing coping skills and strategies to manage anger and associated emotions can improve conflict resolution, communication, and problem solving abilities while showing individuals how to express emotions such as anger in a healthy way.

Individuals struggling to manage anger can be exhausting and overwhelming; often there is a significant negative effect on others in their life. We will work to uncover where the intense anger is originating from and heal. We will also wok to develop new skills and tools to manage emotional situations in a more positive an effective way. It is also important to work to heal the damage to loved ones whom have been affected.

I believe anger management ultimately comes down to emotional regulation and finding an alternative way to still express yourself, but in a more safe and effective way. The goal is not to get rid of the emotion, but to work with it before it overcomes you. What is underneath the anger? What message are you trying to get across when you feel angry? How was anger expressed to you growing up? What emotions did you feel safe to express growing up? How did you learn to deal with your anger over the years? These are questions that I would explore and build skills from here to help you reach a better understanding of the processes behind the intense anger that you are feeling.

Anger has costs psychologically, physiologically and in personal relationships. There are times when no amount of awareness or will, can calm ones Central Nervous System (CNS). When you find yourself reactive to a trigger, and the limbic system of your brain is fired up making anger seem to come out of nowhere, it is difficult to use reason. By utilizing tools of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Neurofeedback(NFB) or EMDR, I can assist your body and brain to learn to calm the CNS, allowing you to think first, act second.

Anger management equips individuals with the tools and insights necessary to understand and regulate their anger effectively. A range of techniques are utilized, including cognitive restructuring, relaxation exercises, and assertiveness training, to help clients identify triggers, manage physiological responses, and express emotions constructively. By fostering self-awareness, empathy, and problem-solving skills, counseling empowers individuals to break destructive patterns of behavior, cultivate healthier relationships, and navigate conflicts with greater resilience and composure.