Anger Management and Counselling in Lions Bay, BC.

Anger is often an expression of unhealed loss and pain. I will guide you to finding healthy ways of expressing anger and explore with you the underlying issues which may be fuelling the anger. Often we respond in the way we observed others express anger and other emotions. The important thing to know is that there are other options to use in expressing anger and we will find those ways together.

I worked for eight years co-facilitating men's mandated domestic violence groups. I am very experienced at helping both men and women deal with a reactionary way of expressing their anger along with the opposite men and women that don't express their anger in healthy and or direct way but instead stuff it down. I have helped many men and women learn how to think and "do" their anger differently. The benefit to learning anger management is happy relationships.

Anger is a healthy and normal emotion. It is only when it is acted out in inappropriate ways that it becomes unhealthy and socially "unacceptable". The key to getting a handle on anger is to learn mindful awareness of what you are actually experiencing in the moment - particularly what you are experiencing physically in your body. That moment to moment awareness shows you the truth of your experience and slows your reaction time, giving you a chance to take a breath, evaluate, and assess how you might want to RESPOND, rather than simply REACT, in a given situation. It is equally important to discover underlying anxiety or depression that might be contributing to unwanted anger.

Do you find yourself yelling at your partner, losing your temper at your children, storming out of the office in a fury of frustration and anger? Anger is a normal, healthy emotion that sometimes gets away on a person. Feeling disappointed in yourself when you 'lose your cool' is information that there may be better ways to handle a situation. Together we will work to help you develop the skills to communicate effectively, maintain your authenticity and foster strong, positive relationships.

Real Solutions to Real Challenges. Common Sense Techniques. Anger can be helpful or it can be destructive. Anger unchecked and not understood can consume a persons attention and energy and keep them stuck. Anger can be hepful in that it is telling us that something is wrong. We may feel unfairly treated, overpowered, and hurt. As a result individuals may become defensive, withdrwan/silent, or even aggresive if they sense injustice and then go the attack. Quite often if the intensity of the anger response seems out of proportion to the current incident then this is most likely due to a cumulative history that comes rushing in to the present and hence the over reaction.

Anger is ultimately a healthy emotion that can be an adaptive and appropriate response to our circumstances. It can let us know what we need and be a helpful guide in taking positive and proactive actions. Yet, in some cases it can control and motivate us to take actions we regret or that lead to negative consequences. Developing an empowering relationship with anger is a skill that can be learned. In order to do so, our individual contexts need to be considered—our personalities, values, life histories, and underlying psychologies. There is no one size fits all approach. Anger can fulfill different functions in each of our lives.

One of the greatest detriments of anger is that it makes us feel helpless and out of control. Anger management techniques aren't meant to eliminate your anger. Anger management techniques put you in charge of the situation and teach you how to make your anger work for you. Resolve conflict creatively, calm yourself before you hit the red zone, recognize the early warning signs of anger…so that you’ll stay in control of your emotions, offer and respond to criticism with confidence and react to a crisis calmly and confidently...so that you will be powerful instead of overpowering.

At the core of managing anger is insight into your own way of thinking and feeling. I can help you to gain this insight and become free of the burden of anger. You will be able to manage and control your reactions and improve your relationships and sense of self. My anger management approach is effective and focused. I will help you sort through the situations that trigger anger responses and help you gain mastery over them. You will ultimately be able to push beyond simply manging your anger to becoming truly free from its hold on you. Contact me to start making changes today.

Anger management counseling can help to identify stressors and learn the steps to stay calm in the face of anger. The goal is to handle tense situations in more constructive and positive ways by reducing the emotional and physical arousal that anger can cause. It will provide the tools to take back your life and resolve the triggers that result in unplanned anger reactions.

We are all thoroughly emotional beings. We were not all fortunate enough to be coached from birth on how to handle our emotions, especially the big ones, like anger. My role is in helping you learn to regulate your feelings in order for those spikes of anger to become less overwhelming. It is never too late to integrate these skills.

Grey Matters International and the work of Kevin J. Fleming, Ph.D approaches issues of anger management in a very humane yet fresh perspective. You see, anger is a normal emotion but it is the valence (intensity) as well as the coupling choice of what one does with this that is the problem. Telling someone to "not" do it or modifying behavior with a trite psychological plan that only breeds a compliant response is not the way to change anger. Brainwave optimization is a new cutting edge technology that allows one to rewire circuitry responsible for reactivity driving the anger. Contact Grey Matters International, Inc now at kevin@kevinflemingphd.com or 877-606-6161.

Collaboratively, we will explore the underlying causes of anger and identify triggers within relationships (with self and other). An emphasis on relational strategies can promote effective expression and constructive conflict resolution. We will work on developing emotional intelligence, helping you recognize and understand what is beneath the surface of your anger. It can be useful to explore past experiences that might be contributing to present challenges. Treatment focusses on building healthy connections and increasing self-awareness.

Anger has costs psychologically, physiologically and in personal relationships. There are times when no amount of awareness or will, can calm ones Central Nervous System (CNS). When you find yourself reactive to a trigger, and the limbic system of your brain is fired up making anger seem to come out of nowhere, it is difficult to use reason. By utilizing tools of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Neurofeedback(NFB) or EMDR, I can assist your body and brain to learn to calm the CNS, allowing you to think first, act second.