Anger Management and Counselling in Colwood, BC.

We are all born with a full set of emotions, with anger being just one of many (happy, sad, fear etc.etc.). There is nothing inherently wrong with anger. In fact it is a very useful barometer of what is not good for us. However, constant, raging anger is a sign post that something is out of balance and needs our attention. There is also a big difference between feeling anger and committing destructive acts. The work that you and I do for anger issues will begin with honouring your feelings. We will then explore what is underneath the chronic feelings of anger. You will discover more life-enhancing ways to take your space and express your self. You will feel more free.

Anger is a powerful emotion that often gets a bad reputation. If you are struggling with anger, one of the most important things to do is to hear the messages anger has for you. I have worked with anger with many clients and truly believe that understanding the deeper layers underneath anger is imperative. I will work with you to process anger and help you uncover what is going on deeper.

My approach is to use a step-by-step process that follows an evidence based approach: goal setting; self awareness; cognitive reframing; behavioural modification; review of progress. Fundamental to the work is a good therapeutic relationship. That is, we have the collaboration and trust to combine your knowledge of yourself and your situation and my skills and knowledge of the clinical issues to make change happen.

A response to life's events falls upon a continuum from neutral to highly-reactive. At times anger, Gandhi called it "Righteous Indignation," is necessary to respond to injustices or inappropriate behaviours. However, uncontrolled, inappropriate anger is destructive to one's self and others. Mindfulness and Metta (Loving Kindness) meditations are excellent tools to deal with anger. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) also called Tapping, along with skillful use of affirmations can help to cool the fires of anger. The benefits of anger management lead to a regulating of emotions and thus a gaining of peace of mind, positive relationships, career and family security.

When anger gets the best of us, we can say and/or do things that we later wish we could change or take back. Anger is an instinctive universal emotion, one in which we all have, but not all expressions of anger have to be hurt. In fact, anger works as a great informant and can motivate us to take action to improve our own lives and the lives of people that we care about.

Anger often stems from feeling so many emotions all at once. You lose a sense of control. You go from 0 to 100 in a blink of an eye. By getting angry you’re attempting to regain control that’s presumed lost. But instead, you’re full of guilt and shame. Feeling angry and reacting in anger, is simply exhausting. I’ll help you learn how to regain control, in a healthy way.